A
male
age
41-50,
*ovebetrayed55
writes:My lover of 4 years just left me for someone else. She betrayed all the promises she had made to me, betrayed my trust and faith in her, forgot all the sweet moments we’ve had, forgot all that i have done for her and just left. The way i find out is when her new boyfriend picks up the phone when i call her. My world has collapsed, i really loved her she was my best friend and my life. The shock and the pain i feel is unbearable. i am depressed and crying all the time and it has affected my work. Now she’s gone never to come back. i will never be able to understand how she could betray me. i have done nothing but love her for 4 years and she has no value for that. She was the first love of my life. i dont know how life will go on….I wonder why she has punished me like this for loving her… i feel so badly used and betrayed by her...how do such people live happily
View related questions:
best friend, depressed Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2019): I spent almost 13yrs. With the love of my life only to find out she was not real? It's only been since just before mother's day which was our anivery. She went to be with her daughter's and never came back. At 61 I am so far away from being able think my way out of this??? I guess one second at a time!!! makes for long dark days??????
A
male
reader, johnwelch  +, writes (24 June 2013):
ive been with my wife 13 years and she told me she did not love me and found another man I tried to take my life was on tablets and after a year seem to be getting back on my feet then one day met my wife again and we started seeing each over and we got back together two years later she done the same thing to me again and I was back where I started I love her to bits and its been 8 months on my own and I still cry and get bad days its the souls way of healing I go to church I work out and booked a singles holiday to try and become independent again you more than likely don't want to talk to another woman again I don't blame you I did not . have a dame good cry ,go to church and talk to some one who will listen if you need to chat to some one im here good luck be strong it is hard its helped me to send this and read you story so I hoped I helped you take care and god bless x
...............................
A
female
reader, woot192  +, writes (14 August 2010):
Love is strange. Trust is something that is hardest to acquire. Give yourself a nudge and a kick in the butt, life moves on and so must you.
:) Cheers!
...............................
A
male
reader, heartbrokendunowhattodo  +, writes (12 July 2009):
hey man, I know exactly what your going through, my girlfriend of 4 years broke uyp with me too, I feel like shit without her, and I've cried like a little girl so many times, Im so sick of crying, she was my best friend in the world, I trusted her more than I trusted even my own brother, She was my everything to me, if i didnt have anyone one else in the world she would have been enough, but she broke my heart, and she's the only person I ever truely loved,
Same as you she broke all the promises she made to me that she'd love me forever and always wanna be with me, worst of all after a month I couldnt take not being with her anymore and went to her place to make her realise how much I loved her and needed her, only for her to tell me that she had cheated on me 2 weeks before she broke up, it felt as though she stabbed me in the heart with a knife. I left for a while but even after that I still loved her with my broken heart and still was willing to forgive her and be with her. but time has passed and we've not seen each other in a while, she says she loves me but that she's not in love with me.Theres a difference you know.
I know for a fact that its just time that makes her forget what we had, and all the good times we had together, the places we went, the things we shared to one another that no one else knows about us. I always thought that she was perfect for me but sadly the fact is that she broke up with me and is still with the guy she cheated on me.
Now at first I cried even more knowing that the girl i loved was with this guy and that the longer she spends with him, the less she will remember me, it hurts so bad to know that she is probably sleeping with him and doing what we used to do, while I sit at home too depressed to go out with friends or have a good time because she's constantly on my mind.
But slowly Im starting to accept the facts and realise maybe she wasnt as good of a person as I thought she was, because how could she do this to me, I was so loyal to her even though I had a few chances to cheat over the years, I never did because I loved her, this also made me think maybe she didnt love me as much as I had thought she loved me, and if thats the case then maybe its better that we're not together because love is a mutual thing, maybe she didnt deserve my unconditional love, and maybe she is worthy of my loyalty.
Its still hard because you cant fool your heart that your not still in love, and I still think of her most of the day, but I know that she doesnt want to be with me because if she did, then she would be here with me and it would be like it used to be. My heart still hurts and I dunno if and when I'll be able to love anyone else, or if I could ever trust someone enough to give them my heart because heartbreak is a cruel lesson.
Everything happens for a reason, so maybe its better for me to be alone. I guess we just have to move on in life and take each day as it comes, I try my best to stay occupied, or be with a friend, because when Im alone doing nothing my mind goes crazy thinking, of why this why that etc.
I feel your pain
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 November 2008): You must be in agony right now. I would be. I dont know if i'll be much help but you should know that I too have felt this too. You need to grieve. Heartbreak is an awful thing any human being has to go through. But the only way you can go now is forward. Keep in mind that everything does actually happen for a reason, even if you dont see it yet. You're going to meet someone very special, someone you're made to be with. And this experience will have taught you the things you need to make the next relationship one that will last a lifetime. But for now, seriously, grieve. Cry, scream, get it all out. You've been basically shot out of the relationship and both your mind and body are in shock. Who knows what will happen in the future. She may even come back to you. Here's another thing that might help. I've started doing it since my life has become all messy. Im having relationship problems at the moment, and my heart is absolutely breaking for you. Buy yourself a hardback notebook. Or a copy. Something to write in. Every day try to fill three pages full of whatever your feeling. It doesnt matter how weird or stupid it sounds, you're just going to pour it all out. So this every single day if you can, and dont read over what you've written, it'll just fire you up again. Just keep writing page after page and it will take a good bit of the weight off the situation so you can sort your head and heart out. Trust me, it works. I've been doing this for about a month now and its really helped me. Also remember though that you are most likely traumatised by the shock. But thats okay. You WILL get through it. I promise you. Try writing. And she hasnt punished you, what you're doing now, you're punishing yourself. Dont hurt yourself because she hurt you. There's a great saying too 'what you think about me is none of my business'. In 98% of cases, its not about you, and its not personal. Be as happy as you believe that she is without you. Or at least give yourself the chance. I hope all goes well for you. Good Luck X
...............................
|
