A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi i am an 18 year old male and i have come out of a 3 year relationship last month as we are both going to university in september and thought it was best if we beoth went our seperate ways.I still have feelings for her and i am incredibly jelous when i see her with another guy.I also hate her for cheating on me whilst in the realationship which i forgave and stayed with her but i still feel i want revenge.Anyway i want to move away from these feelings and find some girls to either just be freinds with or to be more than freinds with, especialy wheni go to university.My problem is that i do not know how to talk to girls, i cannot keep a conversation alive.I ask them a few questions about themseleves and then my mind goes blank and they leave. i do not know what to do as i have had very little experience with girls as i have only had 1 girlfreind.
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my ex, revenge, university Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, mzepg  +, writes (4 June 2011):
p.s. How to talk to girls? Well when you go to college believe me there is so much to talk about when your from a different place. You can talk about the difference, your school major, what people do in that city, what the difference is there, whether they like it or not and so fourth. if the girl is from there and you are not believe me you have plenty to talk about. about forgetting your ex, there is nothing specific, it will take time but mean while keep your self occupied. don't go places to see her on purpose, think that it will only b for a while longer while you move to college. About a new gf, dnt be in no hurry the time will come and so will the girl.
A
female
reader, mzepg +, writes (4 June 2011):
I take it you are on break right now while school starts right? well now is your chance to find things to do. if you have myspace, facebook or any other type of social networks, look up people who are from that area and ask them for suggestions. What is the worst that can happen? They dnt accept you as friends or dont reply? Big wow they don't know. You and you don't know them because your doing it online anyways lol. get on the computer and look up things to do in that city see what comes up. If u are under 21, type in "things to do for 18 year old at blank" and see what comes up and go from there. If you are insecure about ur looks, use these vacation times to start working out and get fit " for your new and exciting life in college". think about it this way, if you are moving to the dorms, there are going to be a lot of other people who don't know anyone and are as worried about not knowing anyone either. like I said start looking at some activities that the school might be havig and have posted before school starts. Maybe when u get there and ur roomate dosent know what to do or go, u will have some ideas. if you do have a roomate, most likely you two will get along and believe me, u will meet so many people there who feel the same way about school as you. dorms usually have activities to get to know each other.
By the way, if you do get in contact with someone online about what to dO in that city, who knows, a girl might find you to b cute and might offer to show you around. Focus on you because maybe it was meant for you to not be with ur ex because you will meet the right one in college. If you where still with ur ex although she cheated, you would have never given the right one a chance. They are our ex's for a reason. she already broke your heart don't give her the advantage of controlling your future by making you jealous and wanting revenge. The best revenge is showing her you are better without her and prove to her that she let something good go by seeig everything you will accomplish. When you forget her, she might or might nor come back. If she does and you want her back and forgive her, she will know that you can do it on your own so she will learn how to appreciate you more and won't take you for granted. If she wants you back and you have forgot about her and decide to not take her back, it will be a lesson to learn for her not to take people for granted and not to cheat either! Don't be jealous, think about I this way, when u see them together, just feel sorry for them because it will be sooner or later that she cheats on him as well.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks mzepg. I have one more issue i didnt add to this, i will be going to a university in a new city not staying in the one i live in now so im not sure what there is to do there so i worry that i will have nothing to talk about
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2011): The short answer to predicament is stop seeing her.
Trying to be friends with ex's you still have feelings for never works.
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A
female
reader, mzepg +, writes (2 June 2011):
Just be yourself when you are around them. If you ask them a couple of questions and then your mind goes blank, then just go off of her answer. Keep on asking her questions based on her replies. You mentioned you will be going to college, is it far or close from where you live? If it is far, try going to places with a live environment around campus and when you see a girl you want to talk to, go up to them slowly and ask if they are from around and go from there such as if they go to school, their major good places to hang out and so fourth. If it is close, you can still do the same but ask if she is from around and if she is not, offer to give her suggestions on what she can do.If you are between the ages of 18-21, you are still young and should enjoy your life. College will be what you make of it and clearly by her cheating and using college as an excuse to break up was an obvious proof she didn't want you. If you both decided to call it quits, maybe she couldn't tell you it was over and decided to cheat as a way out. Don't worry, you will meet a lot of new people in college as long as you interact with what it offers. Get in a club of your major, go to trips and volunteer. Their are plenty of people you will eventually meet and their will be a girl that will come along when the time is right. Meeting a girl in college will give you more of a conversation to talk about. Like your major, why both of you choose it, what future plans are and so fourth. It is obvious that you will be hurt because it has been three years but keep in mind, real life starts after high school, so college is what you make of it. Have fun and remember that life will go on and a new and exciting chapter will begin. I made a mistake of wasting my time on someone who wasn't worth it, don't do the same. And tell me again why you are jealous when you see her with someone else? Do you envy the fact that she cam possible cheat on him as well? Thin about yourself and prove to her she had something special and lost it. Good Luck and again, Have fun in college, in a safe and mature way!
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