A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:OK heres my question...i dated this girl along time ago named gin..gin's best friend Anna, who was also my best friend hooked us up. Somewhere along the way, Ann fell deeply in love with me and didnt want me to date her friend anymore but me being so involved with gin, made it hard to see me with anyone else.Long story short, i broke the heart of my best friend for some girl that doesnt even know me anymore and she was gone without even saying goodbye. Well one day years later she came back and explained to me how bad i had hurt her and spiled her heart out and we made up. And it was like the old days instantaneously..we were instantly making each other laugh just like it used to be.It was sooo awesome. Well...one night we got really close and began making out.We took it alittle far and next thing i knew we were seeing each other every night and i found myself with butterflies in my stomach nervous to see her..i couldnt belive this was happening and it did...i fell in love with her finding out that she was perfect for me after she told me that she was in love with me.It was about the time that i found out that she was married and her husband was in prison...Now hes back in her life and im out and i cant believe that im here saying this but i feel like some guy is married to my girl...i dont even have a solid question..maybe im looking for advice on this because not only do i feel like a bitter ex boyfriend but i also feel like i was betrayed by a friend and it hurts sooo bad...i thought i was sooo much smarter than to let this happen but now i know i dont know crap about this kind of thing...oh yeah...she also keeps sending me myspace comments and e-mails to keep me in an arms length of her...should i just stay were im at and try to be friends or should i cut her off cold turkey...please someone write me back thanyou
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionFirst off, thankyou for your responses...we were dating in secret (my choice) because i didnt know if it was the right thing for me. Over a time span of about 2 months of having her back in my life i couldnt control how she made me feel.It was waaaayy more then having her as a best friend like it was in the past but instead it was like having a bestfriend times 100..but deep down i knew something was wrong so i kept my distance emotionally. She began telling me things like she was obtaining a lwayer for her divorce from her abusive husband. I then told her that i would let her talk to me about anything but when it came to her husband, she had to make that decision on her own.Im not that guy (homewrecker). She started acting like she was trying to convince me that she was leaving him and that made me suspicious of her.I started thinking she was going to try and get me back for the heart ache i had put her through and now im starting to see that my instincs were true as always.She told me that she loved me and i still believe her.She is the type of person that could love someone and truly hate them at the same time (emotionally needy..Scorpio). But none of that matters anymore because hes with her and im not. Even if she left him i could never be with her because i dont want to end up the type of husband that he has, cheated on. I never told her this but i think that i do lover her and it began years ago.It just never got to this level before.When she told me that she was with him again i was shocked to the max.But in the end i was actually relieved because i saw hope for her and her marriage witch made me happy reguardless about how i felt about her. But when i began to reevaluate i started seeing that she was lying to me the entire time about everything.I think her motive was revenge and she got it, but shell never know that. She taught me something, I learned that the days of me going out and hooking up with as many girls as possible are over for me because i dont want that anymore.Ive lived my life dating the most beutiful girls in texas and now after her that doesnt mean shit to me anymore. Shes not the most physically beutiful girl but to me she was perfect for me witch is something that is rare for me to say.I know now what i want out of life and i got it from her. She taught me how to love someone again...
A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionFirst off, thankyou for your responses...we were dating in secret (my choice) because i didnt know if it was the right thing for me. Over a time span of about 2 months of having her back in my life i couldnt control how she made me feel.It was waaaayy more then having her as a best friend like it was in the past but instead it was like having a bestfriend times 100..but deep down i knew something was wrong so i kept my distance emotionally. She began telling me things like she was obtaining a lwayer for her divorce from her abusive husband. I then told her that i would let her talk to me about anything but when it came to her husband, she had to make that decision on her own.Im not that guy (homewrecker). She started acting like she was trying to convince me that she was leaving him and that made me suspicious of her.I started thinking she was going to try and get me back for the heart ache i had put her through and now im starting to see that my instincs were true as always.She told me that she loved me and i still believe her.She is the type of person that could love someone and truly hate them at the same time (emotionally needy..Scorpio). But none of that matters anymore because hes with her and im not. Even if she left him i could never be with her because i dont want to end up the type of husband that he has, cheated on. I never told her this but i think that i do lover her and it began years ago.It just never got to this level before.When she told me that she was with him again i was shocked to the max.But in the end i was actually relieved because i saw hope for her and her marriage witch made me happy reguardless about how i felt about her. But when i began to reevaluate i started seeing that she was lying to me the entire time about everything.I think her motive was revenge and she got it, but shell never know that. She taught me something, I learned that the days of me going out and hooking up with as many girls as possible are over for me because i dont want that anymore.Ive lived my life dating the most beutiful girls in texas and now after her that doesnt mean shit to me anymore. Shes not the most physically beutiful girl but to me she was perfect for me witch is something that is rare for me to say.I know now what i want out of life and i got it from her. She taught me how to love someone again...
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A
female
reader, c-wahoo +, writes (24 July 2008):
How long did things go on before you confessed your "love" for each other? She decieved you by not being honest with you that she was married. That is not all your fault. You should have first asked what she had been doing with her life since you saw her last. She was filling a void in her life until hubby got out.Betrayal from a friend does hurt. Here's something to think about....the saying "Once a liar, always a liar."It is possible for some people to change but they have to acknowledge what they did in order to change it. If you let her back in your life there is a good chance you will be hurt again and you have to figure out if you want to go through that again.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 July 2008): When she came back I think she came to get revenge.She let you fall in love with her when she knew it would never last.She let you get hurt all because she was bored and had no one to go to.How dare she do this to you?You used to be best friends.That is not how friends treat friends.Forget about her.She is TOTALLY!not worth it.Cut her off and never speak to her again.Never reply to her myspace messages again.A girl like that is NOT worth your time.She is married and that could get very messy.There are plenty of girs out there.Youll only move on if you cut her out totally.good luck
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