A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My 67 year old father has been dating a 19 year old girl for a month now, and she is already living with him. She does not work or go to school, she just stays home and lives off him. I, along with my three siblings, are upset and disgusted. What upsets me the most is the fact that my dad has always been in and out of our lives. He missed so many important things such as graduation, birthdays, first day of college, pretty much everything. But yet, he has time for this new girl. My sisters refuse to meet her and my brother does not want to talk about this situation at all. I think I would be ok if she were in her 30s or 40s but almost 5 decades of life separate them. What can they possibly have in common?! Even though I am angry and hurt, I agreed to go to dinner with the two of them. Since my siblings won't come, I have decided to bring a friend with me for support. I am dreading the dinner date, but at the same time hoping for the best. If they do last and get serious, I am not sure if I can take their relationship seriously. Sometimes I don't know whether to laugh or cry. Your advice is much appreciated. Thank you. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 July 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks everyone for your input. My father is not rich, but he is doing well financially. What raised a red flag for me, aside from the age difference, was the fact that this girl willingly moved in with a man she knew for a month. Who does that?! Is she going to take care of him when he can no longer do things for himself? I doubt it. Is she going to stay faithful to him and not stray when a young guy looks her way? I doubt it. This whole thing sickens me but as WiseOwlE said, I will try my best to start fresh and form a relationship with my dad.
Thanks again everyone!
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (19 July 2013):
 Get back to us..
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 July 2013): I am now 48, when I 45 I went on dating sites and many men in their 60s contacted me. I did not find any of them attractive even though they thought they were God gift to women and one of them asked to meet as friends but kept going on about a man must be older than women.
He is now 67 and has married a 32 Philipino who had student visa in UK (obviously wanted visa, and the fact that he had a house paid for and a big pension as a pension) I tried politely telling him but he was in denial and kept saying that she loves him.
I am afraid as a 48 year old woman I am not attracted to men in 50s let alone 60s. we women are looking after ourselves and we look better than them in general.
I get chatted up by men in their 20s but I declined; a I do not want a man anymore, I am happy with who I am and happy with my own and female friends company, but if I were to date they will not be younger nor older perhaps one years give and take.
Your dad is a fool; what is so attractive about a 67 years old to a 19 year old?? I showed a picture of a man who is very very handsome and is only 47 to my son's girl friend and her friends (girls are all 17), they all said that he was too old.
Just ignore him, he is trying to boost his shortcomings, he was not even a good dad to any of you. just like my son's dad, who is now 52 and has a 2 year old girl while his eldest is 31 and has a 10 year old child (his grandchild).
I will never believe the nonsense of a girl can fall in love with older men, yes, perhaps 10-15 years senior but not more, unless the man has money. It is fact.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (18 July 2013):
 they won't last. she will quickly tire of it if he goes nowhere and does nothing and does not support her other than at home... no spending money for her would help...
here's my take on it... humor him. EMBRACE her.
say.. hey your dating my DAD should I call you MOM?
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (18 July 2013):
Is your father wealthy? Other than poor judgement, is he demonstrating any signs of dementia? Is his general health good?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 July 2013): "What can they possibly have in common?!"
Each has something the other wants; your father wants her youth and she wants his money.
One guess as to who is going to come out the winner in this exchange.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 July 2013): You are a brave and wonderful young lady to give your dad a chance; in spite of his shortcomings. He is a lonely man; because he neglected his real family. Now he is acting out to get your attention. Negative or positive.
I'd suggest that you bust a gut and laugh it off.
I can safely speculate that the relationship will have a short life. It is just bordering on the ridiculous. It isn't really what he wants it to be. It is symbiotic. He's using her, and she's using him. She needs a home and a sugar-daddy, and he wants to make believe he is in a romantic relationship with a teenage girl.
The fairytale will end abruptly. Except for financial support and creepy sex; there isn't much more he can offer a girl that age. He has someone young around, to keep him in touch with our constant leaps in technology. That's one advantage.
The fact she doesn't work, or seek an education, shows her intentions are merely to take advantage of an old man, who doesn't mind playing house.
The reaction of your siblings is typical in such a situation. I wouldn't take any of this too seriously. Whatever comes of this mismatched relationship; I doubt will be anything too significant. She'll weasel him out of a few dollars and take off. It might be his karma for neglecting his children over the years.
Just humor him and make the best of it. If you can reach out to make a connection with your father while you still can; that will be the most positive thing that will come of all of this.
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