A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Me and my boyfriend just split up because we can't make it work at the moment - we're both at different schools and it's an LDR so it makes it really difficult for us so I suggested to him that we go our seperate ways and if he wants to give it another go a couple of months down the line then he contacts me, and he agreed and thought that was a good idea.The next day I poured my heart out in an e-mail, told him exactly how I felt, how much I love him, and that we've tried to make it work for a year but until we leave school in a couple of months it can't work right now. He said to me when we agreed 'we're good with everything, the banter, the laughs, the kisses and cuddles and the intimate times were good too, but we can't work as a couple'.And he's completely right, we can't.In this e-mail I wrote him, I basically just told him exactly how I feel, how I wanted to make it work when it was possible, and I said to him 'you know I'm more than willing to give it another go and for us to have a fresh start, but you always keep your thoughts to yourself and I have no idea how you feel or where you want this to go, so in a couple of months, if you miss me, you have to be the one to contact me, coz I can't read you, and I don't wanna pressure you, and I'm not gonna contact you anymore. But maybe all we need is some time'I told him I'm not gonna contact him anymore, and I asked him not to reply to the e-mail but just to take on board everything I've said, and get on with his life.I felt like I had to write the e-mail not only to get a lot of things off my chest and let him know how I feel, but also because I don't wanna look back in a few months wondering what might have happened if I'd have told him exactly how I felt and laid all my cards out on the table.I know he loves me, and he knows I love him, I just don't wanna lose him, and we've built up so much and we're so good together, it's just because we're apart, which is neither of our faults, that it fell apart. We both decided no contact was the best thing, because if we text each other or call each other we both get mad because it makes us both realize how much we wanna be together but can't.My instinct tells me that I've done the right thing in telling him how I feel, and now I have to dust myself off and get on with my life and pretend he doesnt exist by going no contact, and if he contacts me in a couple of months then great, and if he doesn't then I'll be getting on with my life anyway and be over the heartache so it won't matter as much.But i dunno you guys, do you think I did the right thing?I appreciate any feedback x
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2010): The important thing is that you feel you did the right thing. So no matter what happens now, you can be reassured that you did what your instincts told you. I agree with you though, I think it was right for you to be as open and honest as you was. Otherwise you may have been left wondering "what if?..." I think you are going about this situation the right way, even though it must be difficult. Keep doing what you're doing, carry on with your life, and know you did as much as you could here. Good luck. x
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