A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Im only 21 and I feel like everythings ruined and Im going to be alone forever.Ive had boyfriends before and randomly dated guys but Id been with this guy for 2 and a half years and he was the first guy ive fallen in love with and he dumped me a month ago because well he is very unsure of things in his life now, such as school and work and what he will do careerwise and to be honest it sounds like he got depressed. Anyway he dumped me.I cant get over him, I am struggling so badly, he meant the world to me and still does. I still love him. I want him back. Its hurting me so much.I feel like Im never going to get over him and feel like Ive lost the person in my world that mattered most and I feel so unloved and unwanted and ugly and I just feel awful. I feel guilty for everything I ever did that annoyed him because that could have lead to his decision, I hate how stubborn I can be, I hate how pushy I can be, how much question I ask, how much I talk...I hate everything about myself now because I see it as the reason he dumped me.Im totally lost. Im in this hole and theres no escape.
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female
reader, cupidus  +, writes (25 April 2011):
 Every time a guy dumped me for his career I was like this for oh... a couple of days.
But these men really woke me up to my goals.
I can't tell you how many of these men I can thank for getting me up and at 'em. I admire their drive and that they had a plan. Love often gets in the way of plans and goals.
I was able to accomplish so much during these break up stages that is was like life gave them to me in order to get where I needed to be.
So being dumped is nothing I'm afraid of, more of a new adventure in what am I going to study or become next.
Use this time wisely, it's likely going to show you what you should be DOING, not thinking.
A
male
reader, Capri2  +, writes (25 April 2011):
A month is not enough to get over a person you love. In the other hand, if he dumped you because all the things you said you ate about yourself, then you were not meant to be. You have to move on, you will find another guy. In fact, you can find more than one guy who will like you.
If you feel something in your person could bother other people and you don't like it. You should consider seeing a therapist in order to change yourself for good.
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A
female
reader, mandybaby21  +, writes (25 April 2011):
dont beat yourself up about it. I know how it feels, i've been in long term relationships also that didnt end so well. I understand that you love him, but the best thing you can do for the time being is leave it alone. You may not like hearing it but i wouldnt give you advice to hurt you. If it was meant to be, you two will end up back together no matter how long it takes. If however you dont get back together, you will find someone that you love as much if not more than you love him. People like to see their ex's depressed about breaking up. Dont let him see you stressing out about it. You are probably not ugly nor any of those other things you said, but all i can say now is Live&Learn. Good luck and stay strong!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2011): Babe, i feel so sorry for you, because i was in the same situation as you. I know your pain, its awefull, it can really drive u insane. I started to hate everything about myself too. So i talked with my friends, and they just helped me so much. You have to go and talk with a person who really knows you, who knows you are beautiful and who knows you are a caring person. That person will make you feel better about yourself again. Thats really important because otherwise you will lose your confidence when u are around him/a other guy, and boys dont like that at all. When u feel better about yourself again, you can just talk to him in person (not facebook/msn/twitter) and tell him how you are feeling at this moment without him (but dont make it sound to obsessed). If he really loves you, he will see what it has done to you when he broke up to with you. And mabye you guys can work something out again when his situation is doing better to. I hope this helpss. Kiss Christine.
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