A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Ok So Im 7 months pregnant and my boyfriend has cheated on me. I feel so hurt and angry. He has told me that he has relly strong feelings for the other woman. And He is only staying with me for the baby. What should i do forgive him so my baby has a dad? Or move on and try and do it on my own? I really do love him but I But I dont want the baby to be the only reason. Will end up resenting the baby? please sorry its really long.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 April 2008): He has told you the truth and quite unkindly. I think you would be better off without him. Find some family and friends to support you and if possible, someone reliable and trustworthy to babysit if you want to go out sometimes.
A
female
reader, Country Woman +, writes (11 April 2008):
 Sweetheart don't worry about your bf he is obviously being a stupid man and getting his sex elsewhere, especially if you are not having sex at the moment due to being pregnant as it is not always easy when you feel tired and not on best form.
He is the stupid one here and you need to do what is right for you and your baby.
Your bf has told you that he has strong feelings for this other woman and would you really want him to just stay for the sake of the baby, he will only feel trapped and you as you say will resent him and possibly the baby every time you look at him.
Why should you forgive him, have you discussed it fully and asked him why he went to someone else, how long has it been going on?
You need to get your family and friends around you and whilst it is never easy to cope on your own it is also not good for you to feel angry and pent up with lots of stress and resentment right now. You need to be calm and cared for and most importantly loved 110%. If you live together then think about your options and what you want.
You can't exactly walk out and go and get a full time job but at the same time he needs to be responsible financially and so get advice from your family and friends and don't feel alone in all of this.
If you want him around for the birth then that is your choice not his? If you don't want him there for the birth but would rather have either your mum, dad or sibling or a best friend then that is your choice again.
Don't hide what is going on but make sure you decide what YOU want first and then tell the people you want to know so that you are not struggling with all of this on your own, if you want him out of your life shout it from the rooftops and believe me you will see what your family and friends will do as they will support you and be there for you completely OK.
It is so hard to say as your hormones are raging right now and you probably feel quite emotional in any case but try not to sit around with this on your own crying or feeling sick to your stomach as that just isn't good for you or the baby. Try to relax and listen to music or read and get your close friends or family there to help you through this OK.
Sweetheart my heart goes out to you and I am here and so is everyone else, just remember this YOU and YOUR baby are far more important than your bf right now so YOU decide what YOU want to do and to hell with what he wants.
Keep smiling and a big hug coming from me so stay strong and positive - there is nothing more important than a mother's love.
BFN
Country Woman
Big hugs for you
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