A
female
age
26-29,
*pacecadet95
writes:My girlfriend and I have almost no sex life anymore. I've tried talking to her about this. She tells me that she just "doesn't feel like sex". The problem is that she seems to be happy to go without sex forever, but I just can't do that - I gave her some space once and ended up going without sex for almost a month as a result. She didn't even notice that we hadn't had sex for weeks.She confuses me. When there's other people around, she flirts with me so much. She's very flirty and touchy-feely. It drives me mad. I always think that we'll have sex when we get home, or when our friends leave. We never do. She just says that she's tired or has a headache, or has to get up early the next morning. When we first got together it wasn't this bad. We had sex a few times a week - BUT I did always have to initiate it. Intimacy isn't a problem. She doesn't seem to have problems with being close to me. It's just the sex - it's like she hates it or something. I have to pretty much beg to have sex with her. Once we begin, it's really good and she seems to enjoy it, though. I've asked her so many times if she's satisfied when we do have sex: she always says yes. I just don't understand why she doesn't seem to want to have sex with me if it feels pleasant for her.
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male
reader, SensitiveBloke  +, writes (12 April 2013):
 She has a low sex drive, and there's probably nothing you can do about it.
Tell her how you feel, but ultimately I think you'll have to move on as she almost certainly won't and probably can't change.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 April 2013): You need to talk to her and tell her this is an issue for you OP. Tell her what you told us and ask her if this is just how much sex she has always been happy with or has she just lost her libido somehow.If she's lost her libido then she needs to go about fixing it. If this is just how much she is happy with then you're sexually incompatible, which means you either have to try and accept that sex is not going to be a main part of your relationship or you have to go find someone with a similar sex drive.OP sexual incompatibility can be hell, I've only had one relationship where it happened and frankly a fulfilling sex life is far too important a part of a romantic relationship and I had to move on from that woman.
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