A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Dear CupidMy boyfriend and I are both in our 30's. We've been together a year and a half. He loves porn and I accept that, but he keeps trying to get me to watch it with him. I keep telling him I hate it and it makes me uncomfortable and to leave me out of watching it. He keeps telling me I should be more open minded, imaginative, insisting he's trying to inspire me even though I keep explaining that he's making me feel horrible - first because it makes me feel like I'm no good at sex, and secondly because I hate porn and resent the fact that he keeps trying to force me to watch it. Our relationship is really great otherwise. What should I do? He's really really stressing me out.
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 June 2007): Agreed with Kenny on this one. If you told him your feelings and you hate this stuff, then that should be the end of this discussion. Set some big boundaries and don't hesitate. Be strong, girl and I really hope you have a lot more self-respect and chutzpah, than he thinks you have. Gosh, what happened to good old-fashioned romance? You know--candles, wine, some sexy music?
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 June 2007): hi i know how u feel the same thing kinda happen to me . all u need to do is sit him down n talk tohim. lethim know howu truelyfeeln if u loves u he will understand
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2007): hi hun i think your man should have more respect and not try and make you do something you are obviously not happy with, it sounds to me love that this makes you uncomfortable full stop.
A loving partner should i would have thought be more interested in the one he loves and making you happy in the bedroom area... what is he trying to inspire you to be? im sure i'd get more inspiration if my man was paying attention to me( which he does) i have male friends and although yea they have watched porn even my fiance did but he said to me he doesnt need that as he has a loving relationship and what we need to inspire us is each other. when not in a relationship thats the only time it was watched, There are couples who of course are happy to do this together, we all work differently, so to force someone to do something they dont feel comfortable with is wrong. you are a individual you have your likes and dislikes he really should be respecting your wishes if he loves you so much, after all you respect his sweetheart, im not suprised it makes you feel your no good at sex what does he think its going to be good education, dont let this get to you as far as im concerned he should be taking you to bed so you then may get the chance to be inspired, if it were me id just ignore the man (but thats me it would get on my nerves if i dont feel comfortable doing something then i get selective hearing) i do hope this gets better for you very soon take care of you xx
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A
male
reader, kenny  +, writes (3 June 2007):
 He should have respect that that you are not in to porn films, and should not keep on forcing you to do something you really do not want to do.
Don't give in to him and let him dictate to you, telling you you are unimaginative, or not open minded, i think he is out of order.
Personally if i was in a relationship and love my partner i woulden't disrespect her by watching porn in the first place.
Good luck x
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