A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I met with this guy about 4 times. We also kept in touch by phoning and texting each other. He agreed to taking things slow with me and insisted that he wasn't after me for just sex. After our date he invited me to his place. We were both drunk and it was very late. After an hour of talking, kissing, and cuddling he started talking to me about me being a virgin. He said I'll make your first time special. He then said sex is no big deal, it doesn't mean anything.It started getting late so I asked if he could book me a taxi. He said that before I leave he wanted to touch my breasts. He asked if I wanted to watch a film and I found myself in his bedroom watching a film. He then got on top of me and started kissing me. He then got my hand and placed it on his penis, to give him a hand-job. He fell a sleep and unintentionally I fell asleep too and found myself waking up next to him. In the morning he insisted on me watching him in the shower. He text me a few days later asking when he gets to see my assets. It appears to me now that he is more concerned on getting sex from me, but he waited 4 months, and texted and phoned me everyday. What was he after, why did he pursue me for so long?
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female
reader, Lexie88 +, writes (4 January 2012):
I was going to write some long winded answer but Cerberus has said it all :)
It's very obvious what this guy wants. And when a guy says that sex is no big deal and that it doesn't mean anything, you RUN!!
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (4 January 2012):
Seems like you need to learn how to say no, or better Hell no!
He seems rather odd and honestly, I would stay FAR FAR away from him. He is a creep that doesn't respect your verbal wishes. He thinks no means yes.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (4 January 2012):
did he tie you up and put you in the bathroom to make him watch you?
men love a good chase... you are fun to chase because you give him a little bit more each time...
DO NOT go to his apartment.
DO NOT go to private places with him...
he only wants sex.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2012): "What was he after, why did he pursue me for so long?"
He's looking for love and he's being really nice and romantic about it too. He loves your personality and isn't after sex at all.
If you believe any of what I just said you're a total idiot. If you ever believe a guy who insists he's not only after sex then you're also an idiot. When it's not what we're after we don't need to say it and everything he said after that about sex means it's obvious he is only after that. Sex means nothing huh? Sounds like a great catch.
OP texting and phoning is not effort, you can text and phone while taking a shit. It's easy, it doesn't take any effort at all and you can do it at any time.
"What was he after?" Do I really need to spell that out for you or are his actions not enough of a clue for you?
"Why did he pursue me for so long?" We'll pursue a piece of ass for as long as it takes with a girl like you who doesn't know how to make a guy prove himself first.
No offence OP, but everything you said in your question tells me you're a bit of a sucker, that you're either clueless or desperate.
Texting and phoning every day is not effort OP, it's not. Wining and dining is effort and besides you're a virgin, what guy isn't going to take time bag one of those and be the guy to pop her cherry.
Dump this loser and for the future OP, meeting in person, spending time doing fun non-sexual things together is effort. If a guy will spend time and money, taking you out, meeting you for a couple of drinks and generally just hanging out with you then he's interested and making an effort. Phone calls, texts, online chats are no effort, they're the bare minimum and can be done while doing any number of other things.
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A
female
reader, Moo's Mum +, writes (4 January 2012):
I find it creepy that he insisted on watching you in the shower! It does sound like he was after sex but none of us can truly know what was in his head. The bottom line is: Do you like him? Do you find him attractive? Do you want to spend time with him? If the answer to those questions is yes then call him up. If it's no then cut contact.
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