A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Me and my boyfriend have been together about 6 months and we have a pretty normal happy relationship. Decent sex life and I love him and care for him dearly. I see a future for us.There is one thing that always comes up though recently. Pregnancy. Not the actual act of having a baby but the pregnancy part (e.g. Baby bump, milky breasts, swollen body etc). And it's not me that talks about it, it's him. And he loves to talk about it during sex.My boyfriend loves pregnant women, he loves the way they look and loves the thought of sex with a pregnant woman. It's one of his biggest turn ons. Nothing comes close. To the point that even talking about me being pregnant gets him aroused. At first I thought it was a one off- we all talk about naughty things we don't mean during sex, but this continued. He keeps saying that he can't wait until I am pregnant and he can show people what we have done, have me wearing tight dresses and admire my pregnant figure in lingerie or in a bikini on holiday . Said he can't wait to cuddle up with me and hold my bump. And have sex with my pregnant body and admire it. But he never mentions the actual baby part. He has talked about the fact that he wants a few children one day, he wants a few kids but not right now. But he also wants to do it unprotected with me and risk having them now. Is this normal male behaviour? Why do men love pregnant women? Is this something to do with genetics ? Or a normal fetish? It seems to be such a big fetish for him. I'm worried that normal me doesnt actually make him hard, it's just the thought of me being pregnant that does. I'm a short , slim and petite woman and obviously would get much bigger when pregnant. I've never encountered this before. obviously I'm using protection because I don't want to be pregnant at this stage in my life. But he is older (early thirties) and all his friends wives have had children, could this be influencing him? I've seen him liking photos of his best friends wife's baby bump and he obviously cares a lot about his friends children and is a godfather to a few of them . I'm mid twenties and I don't want a child this early on into a relationship as I know I'll be judged by people. I feel like this is the only thing that is getting him off at the moment. Pregnancy is not all glamorous, things leak, noises /more gas is made, we sweat more and strange things happen to the the body. Sometimes I've put hot lingerie and heels on and really made an effort and we have been having sex but he hasn't been able to "finish up" or "cum". Which I find so strange for a guy it's usually the other way around. Sometimes after alcohol he cannot get an erection at all. No matter how hot I make myself look.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2018): I would worry that he might want to impregnate you, have fun while you are pregnant, and then force you to have an abortion, perhaps repeatedly. (I am pro-choice, but this scenario would not be by choice!)
It's your choice but he doesn't sound worth the trouble.
A
male
reader, Been there Now over it +, writes (14 February 2018):
I've had more than my share of guy talk and never once has a anyone mentioned this fetish. Many if not most or even all people have fetishes but this is certainly one of the more peculiar ones and not a healthy one, at that. As you suggest, one has to wonder how this fetish would affect your sex life in an ongoing relationship, especially after you've been pregnant, had the baby and then gotten back to your non-pregnant self. You're not going to know that until you've gone thru the process.
I'd say his fetish is a serious source of concern but I wouldn't tell you to quit the relationship over this. You should follow your own intuition, being very honest with yourself as to how you see this relationship progressing thru possible life cycles. At best, it sounds like you will have some disappointments in your own sexual satisfaction if your continue with this relationship.
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A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (14 February 2018):
Its just a fantasy / fetish of his. Nothing to worry about, unless you find it a turn off. In which case it just means you are incompatible.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2018): IMO this sounds like a fetish. I've had my share of lovers and not one of them has brought pregnancy or pregnant women into the bedroom. In fact, most of them either had me assure them I was using birth control and/or used condoms.
That being said, I'd be interested to see what the uncles have to say about this.
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A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts +, writes (13 February 2018):
This seems like a fetish, more than just a turn on. It's also *highly* irresponsible to have/want unprotected sex before you're both ready to be parents.
Personally, I'd consider him too high risk. He could sabotage contraception and bail once the baby is born. It's up to you, but I'd leave.
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