A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi I will try to condense a long complex story .I split with my sons dad three and a half years ago .it was a painful and messy split .we had a very intense 5 years together where we were either deeply in love of fighting. We were over the moon when i became pregnant and the first couple of years we were so happy but we still had terrible rows. I couldnt take anymore and didnt want my son to be troubled so we split .I was addicted to the relationship and it nearly killed me to walk away since then my x has married and his wife is exoecting their first child .I was totally cool and my feelings for my x are so different now and I would never get back with him .I wanted to be amicable now for the sake of our son and began stepping to his wife and generally being supportive and kind re the baby .my x has found this hard to deal with .The night my x's wife went into labour he text me and I feel so emotional and tearful .It has hit me hard and I dont know why .I am over my x and happy for my son thst hes going to have a half brother The other thing is his wife us from indonesia and is going home for 3-6 months when baby is 3 months old and I feel so worried my son will be so sad .I am so surprised I am so emotional or is this quite normal ?
View related questions:
my ex, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, oldbag +, writes (21 September 2014):
 Its not wrong to feel like you do, it not only cements and brings home the reality that he has moved on, but that he has another child now. It will bring back memories of when you two had a child and all that emotion you shared
It doesn't mean he will love your child less, just that he has 2 children now.
You will adapt and may have another child yourself in a new relationship - a healthy happy relationship.
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (20 September 2014):
 I think it's a little natural for you to have mixed feelings about the new baby and the new marriage.
BUT this is not something you can change or that will be BAD for you or your son. It's a new little life.
You son won't be sad about the baby being born or being gone for a little while. He is 5. A baby is interesting but not really much else. Yes, it's his little brother but a baby... is just not much of anything for a 5 year old. Know what I mean?
You and your ex couldn't make it work, it happens. You made a son whom you BOTH love. You EX found someone else and has now another son. It's pretty much the nature of the beast, called humanity. Doesn't mean YOUR boy will be less important.
Wish them well.
...............................
A
female
reader, deirdre  +, writes (20 September 2014):
It is normal that you are emotional or even upset when you learn that someone who you spent a few years with, has has a baby with someone new. Of course you two have a son together so it is normal that you feel something as this is your sons half sibling. Take time out to let these feelings pass, it is clear from your post that you have your sons feelings and wellbeing above anything else so you are doing nothing wrong. Best of luck x
...............................
A
female
reader, Fari +, writes (20 September 2014):
 You have been through so much its only natural you would feel this way. Give yourself a break. Just be yourself which is the good and caring person that you already are.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 September 2014): No you have every right to feel that way. It just means you are human .
...............................
|
