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I want to end my relationship with a married man

Tagged as: Breaking up, Cheating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (1 October 2019) 8 Answers - (Newest, 2 October 2019)
A female China age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I am in a relationship with a marrired man for past 8months. We had known for last three years. I am truly in love with him though its wrong. I don't have any intention to destroy his beautiful family. Hes got a heart of gold. I wanted to end the relationship with no hard feeings and even I told him that we should end it before anything gets worst. But he won't even say a thing about ending our relationship though he stopped calling me for weeks. What should I do? Its my fault for falling for him

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A male reader, Billy Bathgate United States +, writes (2 October 2019):

A heart of gold. Yet he cheats on his wife. Yeah I’m sure that’s possible.

If you want to end it end it. Send him an email or text or What’s App message telling him that it’s over between you. Then block him in all the ways he contacts you. If he shows up at your home or work refuse to open the door or speak with him.

It’s that darn simple.

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A female reader, Ivyblue Australia +, writes (2 October 2019):

Ivyblue agony auntLife is about choices. When you make a choice its something you have control of. So end it. Simple. No contact by you and block and dont engage with him making contact with you. Let his heart of gold do the right thing by his family and by you

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (2 October 2019):

Yes OP it is your fault for agreeing to be the sex toy for this married cheater. That said, if this man truly had a heart of gold, he would keep his dick in his pants, unless going to the toilet, or making love to his trusting and loving wife! His amazing kindness to you is easy to understand: he has been using you vaginal oven to roast his slab of meat! That is Quid Pro Quo! That means you do for me, and I will do for you. The cheater doesn t love you, he is just using you as his live sex toy. Stay away from him! Block him on all of your devices! If he mails you anything, write on the outside of it Return To Sender! Do not open it! You said you want to end it, so just do it! You do not need permission, or a comment, from him! Then date only single men. Best wishes for your happy future OP!

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A female reader, mystiquek United States +, writes (2 October 2019):

mystiquek agony auntIts up to you to end this once and for all. I'd wager a bet that he will allow this affair to continue as long as you are willing to put up with being second best. Why would he want to end it when he's got the wife and a home and you as his dessert.

So end it. Block any contact you have with him whether its phone email facebook..whatever. Then move on. Leave him in the past. Don't delude yourself into thinking you will ever be more than his little secret. You won't. Find a man who is single and wants to make you his whole world, not just a fraction of it.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (2 October 2019):

Sweetheart, he doesn't have a heart of gold; if he cheats on his wife and family.

He treats you nice, because you supply sex on the side; and you're his chosen concubine. He may even be nice to his wife; but he's a wolf in sheep's clothing! His phony kindness is for the purpose of keeping his wife in the dark; or perhaps to persuade her to look the other way. Gifts and sweet-talk keeps you on your back. It also delays and deprives you of God's blessing of true-love and a future.

Let me express this this succinctly and without undue prejudice.

You aren't that deeply in-love in the short-span of 8 months. You're intrigued by the secrecy of your affair, and the novelty of seducing a stolen-man. You're yielding to temptation, and that only adds to the sweetness of the forbidden-fruit.

It's nothing new, and the story always begins and ends the same-way. He never leaves his wife, and the mistress becomes addicted and enslaved to the affair. One of my lady-friends describes it as "just plain nasty!" She has a point. It revolves around lust and sex.

You're deluding yourself. Trying to make it about love, in a vain attempt to justify it. It's for his carnal-pleasure, you're caught-up in fantasy and sexual-euphoria. Painting pretty pictures in your mind, to ease your guilty-conscience. That's easier than admitting you're an accomplice in an adulterous-affair. To put it in simpler terms, my dear!

You haven't been fully immunized to your better-judgement and moral-values. You want to do whats right! Sometimes that foolish heart pulls you in the wrong direction.

You have a brain for the purpose of overriding bad-decisions made by the heart. You have common-sense to make you control your impulse in order to avoid impetuous actions.

Home-wreckers always beget their due payback, and cheaters only win for the moment. There are always consequences to bad-choices. Sometimes payback and retribution can be delayed for years, but they do catch-up with you! The time-delay only makes it all the more painful when it hits! Just when life is sweet and all is well; some random-woman steals YOUR man, and wrecks YOUR home! The past replays in an immediate flashback!

Just can-it with the novela theatrics and soap opera drama, and end it.

Go find yourself a single-man who is faithful, available, and not betraying another woman. Purge all the toxic treachery and betrayal he has injected into your soul. He has stained you with dishonor. It's not a set-stain, because it hasn't been there that long! You can still wash it off!

Glamorizing it doesn't clean it up. It's putting lipstick on a pig. He's a rotten-cheater, and you're his adulterous-lover.

Call him, and end it. Cleanse your conscience, washaway his nasty slime, and move on. Block his calls, and start looking for a new place to live. Go find a new job, and start-over from scratch. You're young and free! Leave this mess far behind you!

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A female reader, Youcannotbeserious United Kingdom +, writes (1 October 2019):

Youcannotbeserious agony auntWhat should you do? Phone his wife and ask HER. SHE will tell you what you should do.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 October 2019):

you might not be able to end it with no hard feelings. but you deserve way better than being the other woman. just tell him you don't want to continue seeing a married man, as you deserve more and so does his wife.

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A male reader, N91 United Kingdom +, writes (1 October 2019):

N91 agony auntHe has a heart of gold? Lol

He’s cheating on his wife, he is a piece of shit, the absolute lowest of the low.

Block his contact and move on with your life, very simple. Stick to single guys, nobody likes a home wrecker.

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