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I text and ask girls out, but they don't reply! Where am I going wrong?

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Question - (25 June 2006) 5 Answers - (Newest, 28 June 2006)
A male , anonymous writes:

I have recently found a couple of girls I like. They are nice to me when I see them, but If I text them and ask whether they'd like to meet and do something like go to town or the cinema they just don't reply.

For example a msg might read "hey, just wondrd if ud like to go 2 the cinema 2morrow night" and then they just ignore me, and never txt back, and next time I see them carry on as if everything's normal.

Odd thing is they both do it, but they don't know each other. Please help, it's getting me down. Where am I going wrong?? And what do I do now! :(

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (28 June 2006):

buddy, she doesnt answer you because texting them to go out with you is CHEAP! if your man enough to have a girlfriend, then ask them face to face instead of being immature.

if i were you, id regroup your plans before expecting a reply.

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A female reader, Bev Conolly Australia +, writes (26 June 2006):

Bev Conolly agony auntI agree with everything that's been written so far.

Asking a girl out by text lacks pizzazz. It's like getting someone else to do it for you, or taping a note to her front door and running away! Sure, there's a risk involved in asking a girl face to face, but she'll respect you much more for it. And besides, she can't really ignore you when you've asked her directly, now, can she?

Text might be OK when you're in a long-term relationship, and the fact that she'll go out with you is established already and really just a matter of where and when, but when it's a first time, girls want to be sure that you're serious. And text doesn't cut it in that way.

Next time, forget letting your phone talk for you and ask her directly. You sound sincere in your letter here, and if you have the same level of sincerity with the girls when you talk with them, you're sure to get a much more positive response.

Good luck!

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A male reader, Dr. Reality Check United Kingdom +, writes (25 June 2006):

Dr. Reality Check agony auntWell, women like confidence. Asking them out by text probably tells them you're too chicken to do it in person. Do it face to face with some confidence, and you will get your answer.

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A female reader, kellyO United Kingdom +, writes (25 June 2006):

kellyO agony auntHi there,

They may be several reasons why they didnt respond to your text messages. Might be they probably didnt think you were serious about your offer, were too shy to respond to an offer by text, or werent interested in it.

Whichever way it might be better if you ask them directly when next you are comtemplating asking them out. The reason for this is that you will have direct response to your offer and you can probably infer how enthusiastic the other person's feel about you.

I know rejection is difficult to hear and we all want the easy way out. But the process of dating and courting involves that and everyone at one time or the other have gone through that phase and we all consider that the learning process.

Take care and all the best

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A female reader, matron +, writes (25 June 2006):

matron agony auntAsk them face to face and see what happens then. They may not think you are being serious, they wont be able to ignore you so easily and will hopefully give you a chance or atleast tell you why they dont want to.

Dont give up trying but do do it face to face sweetie, lots of luck x

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