A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:im 18 a female, i feel im going to be a virgin for ages, i dont want to get to 20 and still be a virgin, although i do value being a virgin but im just frightened i will be one for a long time and when i finally do have sex the bloke will laugh at me! Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 March 2008): Laugh at you? Well consider that a good thing because a person like that would be in need of dumping, preferably at sea.
If you know the basics then it is very hard to screw up sex, watch a couple of porns to get a basic idea of what goes on and that is enough.
You don't have to be a sexual expert especially at your age. Hell, most men would be thrilled to be the first for their girl, better then finding your true love has nicknamed you #18.
About the only way a guy will laugh at you in bed is if you tell him a joke or print a funny picture on your stomach.
Just turn it around, if you loved a guy and he turned out to be a virgin and unsure of what to do, would you laugh at him? (Female readers: Yes and I would tell all my friends about it)
Sex is far less complicated then you seem to think. You do NOT have to do the kama sutra the first night, stuff like that is for when you are far older and you want to spice things up, right now just having sex should be spicy enough.
About the only thing I can advice you, is don't be afraid to touch him and give feedback. Don't just lie on your back and let him do all the work and if it feels right, make a sound even if you are naturally quiet. The only bad sex for men is when the woman is non-responsive.
A
female
reader, honestheart +, writes (15 March 2008):
I lost my virginity at 16. I though at the time it was right. I was old enough to make my own decisions. I'm now married and i'm not saying i would have reserved my virginity for my husband, my boyfriend at the time seemed the ideal person to lose it to. Two years later he broke my heart. I'm not saying you'll never have your heart broke but please waut until you love someone and they love you. It makes it worth the wait i promise!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 March 2008): I was in a similar situation and I never told the guy I lost my virginity to that I was actually a virgin. I was embarrassed about being a virgin at that age when he already has had a few previous sexual partners. He never found out about it. I only bled about half an hour after the intercourse and not right upon penetration, and I suspected my hymen was already a bit torn from previous sexual experiences. The point is, you don't HAVE TO tell the guy that you're a virgin. Even if you bleed upon penetration, you can always blame that on your menstrual cycle.
Though I would advice against that because like others have pointed out, the guy will likely only be surprised and will be respectable enough to not laugh or joke about your virginity.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 March 2008): same here.
it's wierd when everyone speaks about they're experience and i have nothing to say on the subject. i've never even had a bf.
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A
female
reader, shadowre  +, writes (15 March 2008):
 a bloke that cares about you, wont laugh at you! simple as that. if he does, then you really shouldnt be going out with him! and take your time with having sex, it will come when your good and ready. good luck
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A
male
reader, DoubleM  +, writes (14 March 2008):
 There is no hurry, but whatever bloke has that privilege will be among the happiest guys on the planet that day. Just make sure he cares about you, and vice versa, be safe about it and certainly don't think that a nice young man would laugh at you. It is an honor, yet also a responsibility for the man to know what he is doing - be loving and gentle and kind, in my opinion.
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A
female
reader, thatgothgirl20 +, writes (14 March 2008):
 You know, I had a friend in school who was a virgin. This guy taunted her, saying, "Are you going to be a virgin for the rest of your life?" And later on in her mind she was saying "Yes, if I LIVE TO BE 21."
Point of the story is this-you have your whole life ahead of you to lose your virginity.
And I understand your fear of being laughed at. I'm worried about snickering, etc., but Idk if it's really going to happen that way. And any guy who laughs at you during that act is a jerk anyways.
You say that you value being a virgin. If you value this so much, then when you do lose it to someone, it has to be to someone who will value it as much as you do, otherwise it will be a loss.
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A
female
reader, Jmo +, writes (14 March 2008):
 I'm close to %100 positive that whoever you end up losing your virginity to will not laugh at you. Seeing as how you value your virginity, you'll probably feel ready with a sensitive, caring man. Besides a lot of guys prefer virgins for a myriad of reasons. Don't worry about it.
-Jmo
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