A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: I don't know what is wrong with me. I have never had sex but i don't think it is possible for me too anyway. I am so tight i can't even put in a tampon without it hurting too much to bare. I have tried fingering myself to see if it was possible and it worked like twice but any other time i have tried to it felt as if my insides were being ripped out or burned or somthing painful. I'm 16 and can't even wear a tampon. What is wrong?
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male
reader, chlez83 +, writes (21 February 2008):
I was also looking at your profile age and was about to congratulate you for being a virgin at such an adult age but i guess i can still congratulate you for being a virgin.
Sometimes a more severe condition called vaginismus is responsible for vaginal tightness; women with vaginismus experience strong, involuntary muscle spasms of the vaginal muscles during sexual intercourse or vaginal penetration by any object including fingers and tampons.
Vaginismus is persistent or recurrent spasm of the outer third of the vagina that interferes with intercourse. It can usually be treated by the use of vaginal dilators of increasing diameter plus relaxation training. The success rate increases in couples where the partner is involved in the therapy process. While treatment can help, it is important to note that some women have very intimate, loving relationships without intercourse.
Take care.
A
male
reader, gabba's say +, writes (20 February 2008):
I think this may be normal for a girl your age. I think if you are turned on first it may help but I am no expert in this field. I think it is a case of hurties the first few times then it gets more easy.
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A
female
reader, jabey +, writes (20 February 2008):
nothing is wrong with you thats the most important thing you need to realise.
sometimes even at sixteen, the hynem has not been broken this is a thin layer of skin which goes across the vagina, hence why women bleed sometimes when they loos e their virginity. This sometimes breaks before a women has intercourse, but other times it breaks by a tampax, or even horse riding etc.
Secondly, when you tense up, your vagina will tense up too. Remember every woman is capable of the vagina stretching to be able to give birth, you will be capable of this too.
When a lot of women first have sex they will feel tense, and it may be painful, but the art is to have a partner who is kind trustworthy and understanding. when you meet someone like this and feel safe, he must be able to put you at ease and with gentle foreplay and consideration, you will relax and things will become natural.
so remeber you are normal and you will be able to have sex. Try to elax, dont push yourself xxx
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A
female
reader, duskyrowe +, writes (20 February 2008):
I have read this letter before a few weeks ago plus you seem confused with your age too.
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