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I don't just want him to email me, I'd like him to call sometimes - What can I do?

Tagged as: Online dating, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (17 July 2008) 1 Answers - (Newest, 17 July 2008)
A female United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Hi all,

I've been reading this site and there is some EXCELLENT advice here, so thanks to all of you who're willing to dish it out.

My question is - I like this guy. We've been casual dating for almost two months, no sex yet since it takes me a while to get comfortable with new people. I think he's been kind of annoyed/insulted by this, but I'm very good at standing my ground and he's been very respectful.

When I'm with him I really like spending time with him and he's very attentive. But when I'm not with him, he sends me cute emails, etc. but he can go days without calling me or texting me and it always emails and honestly, I dont like that at all. I dont want on online relationship or one that doesnt exist outside the date. I mean, I dont expect him to be calling me 50 times a day, but something along the lines of... hey, I'm thinking about you would just make me feel AMAZING.

Do y'all think there is anything I can do? Should I talk to him about it? Should I start doing it first maybe to give him the hint? Should I wait? Should I just let him go? On the one hand, I dont want to seem really clingy and needy and childish to him, but on the other hand, I've receieved this kind of attention my whole life (only child syndrome) and its really important to make me feel comfortable.

Thanks!

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A female reader, PsyCookie United States +, writes (17 July 2008):

PsyCookie agony auntThere are some people who aren't very comfortable calling people on the phone. Maybe your guy is like this.

Now, I think you really should tell him. Try to tell him subtley. The way I would do it is make a sweet voice and tell him "sweety, I wish I could hear your voice more often" and he'll probably get the hint.

Also, you could call him from time to time. Who knows, he probably is doing something that has made him forget calling you.

The key here of not sounding needy is the way you deliver your wants. Before asking him something, try to prepare the way you'll deliver it. The way I do it has worked for me, but it's different for every woman.

Good luck and I hope he does call more often!

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