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I caught my wife exchanging explicit pictures on her cell phone, is divorce imminent?

Tagged as: Breaking up, Cheating, Marriage problems<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (11 December 2012) 9 Answers - (Newest, 13 December 2012)
A male United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

I caught my wife exchanging explicit pictures on her cell phone she says she has no attraction to this man it was purely an emotional connection I don't know if I will ever be able to trust her again children are involved is divorce imminent?

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A male reader, Serpico United States +, writes (13 December 2012):

If you believe for one second that this is "an emotional thing" only, please call me because I have some swampland in Florida for you....

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A reader, anonymous, writes (13 December 2012):

Emmotional or physical, what do you want? And is she prepared to repair the damage? Are you willing to forgive. The answer to these questions is a deciding factor whether a divorce is imminent.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2012):

Oh wow.

Emotional affairs are as dangerous and crossing the marital line as physical affairs, sometimes worse, depending on your definition. Sending explicit pictures of herself is NOT an emotional affair, that's a sexual affair waiting to happen. What she did was wrong, plain and simple.

Now, if this is all she's really done, there may be help in saving your marriage, if it's what you want, with immediate marriage counseling and she also needs to see someone on her own to get to the bottom of why she made this choice. This is her own issue and a problem she needs to face and deal with for the sake of you and your family...not only was it morally wrong in having high moral standards in a marriage pov, there are children involved in this marriage which makes it even worse.

Trust has been broken and it would take a hell of a lot to get that back if it was me.

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A male reader, TrancedRhythmEar Saudi Arabia +, writes (12 December 2012):

TrancedRhythmEar agony auntThats bs about emotions shes also sexually attracted. Shes wanting to end it but wont take initiative directly instead she sneaks. End this seems like shes done anyway.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2012):

When was the last time you sent an "explicit" picture of yourself to convey pure emotion?

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2012):

"is divorce imminent?"

That depends. How fast can you get one?

If you are waiting for her to leave you, then you are naive or misguided or passive to a fault, to be polite.

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A female reader, person12345 United States +, writes (11 December 2012):

person12345 agony auntIf it was emotional then why was she sending sexy pictures? An emotional affair on it's own can be devastating. If you don't trust her and won't ever again, then it's time to end this.

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A female reader, EbonyBlossom United Kingdom +, writes (11 December 2012):

EbonyBlossom agony auntIf she is interested in someone else emotionally, then thats even more of a reason for you two yo split up. If it was physical with no Emotion Then it could be rectified as she may still have feelings for you and regret it. But if she was in love with you, then she wouldnt fall For someone else. I would leave because as long as youre with her, youre closing all other options of finding happiness with someone else.

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A male reader, Fatherly Advice United States +, writes (11 December 2012):

Fatherly Advice agony auntI see, She says it was an emotional affair as opposed to a physical affair.

But the EA was within days of becoming a PA. And you caught her.

So is divorce imminent? Do you want it to be? Is she willing to return with full purpose? Marriage's can survive infidelity, in some cases. They can't survive continuing or repeated infidelity. They cant survive if the betrayed partner is unable to heal from the wounds. In other words if you don't get past the place where every time you look at her you see her cheating with the other man, the mind pictures will kill your relationship.

You mentioned trust. That will have to be rebuilt, brick by brick and it will take some time, like years time, not weeks time.

As great as this forum is it is not the one you need right now. PM me for directions to another.

FA

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