A
male
age
22-25,
*wertyuiop123
writes:Basically im a 14 year old male ive been with my girlfriend for 9-10 months and me and her are really close we've not had sex or anything that serious , I just don't know how far I should go at this age I would never force my girlfriend into anything she doesn't want to do Reply to this Question
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female
reader, celtic_tiger +, writes (10 November 2014):
 Well done for asking, before doing something you regret.
The serious part first...
The law in the UK states that any sexual activity under the age of 16 is ILLEGAL. Which includes sexual touching, oral sex, and penetrative sex of any orifice.
It is also illegal to send sexual photos if you are under 18 - even if you are taking them of yourself. If caught you could be prosecuted for the production and distribution of child porn - so no NAKED selfies!
Now, that all sounded a bit heavy, but you have to remember that at 14 most girls (speaking from personal experience) are very good at pretending. They want to seem "grown up" "mature" and sexy in the way that older girls, popstars and filmstars are portrayed in the media. They all want to brag about older boyfriends and how they are more advanced than their friends (girls are bitchy!) It is all about one-upmanship, no matter how nice a girl may be. They would go along with situations because they felt they had to keep up the pretence rather than actually wanting to do it.
In reality, they are still very much going through puberty. Getting used to new bodies, new brains and potentially still getting used to having a period. She may only have started having them within the last year - emotionally it can be a lot to get used to.
She is in no way ready emotionally or physically for taking a relationship beyond kissing. If you are still together when you are BOTH 16, then is the time to start exploring a more adult relationship, however right now neither of you are in a position to deal with any potential consequences.
Sex can completely change a relationship. It brings jealousies and new emotional feelings. Relationships at your age come and go, and are a learning curve about growing up. Don't rush into things, you are only 14.
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (10 November 2014):
 I think kissing and holding hands is pretty much it. But being curious is normal, so I would say talking about things is also okay, as long as she's also curious and wants to talk about it.
Most girls at 14 do not want sex. They just want romance and dream about a future. A relationship is so much more than just the physical aspect though, it's someone you're close with, who you can share all your secrets with, do things with, talk to, trust, and build up a close bond with. Sex is just the icing on the cake, and once you're of age you can start experimenting with that. But as of yet, stick to whats legal and build up a solid foundation.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 November 2014): I think that forge doesn't know what acts of adultery means... it means cheating on your partner basically; I think he was trying to say no sexual acts in general, which I thihnk is right because if you have to ask someone how far you should go at 14 you're obviously not ready! Also remember consent is the most important thing about any sexual act and then also CONTRACEPTION obviously. I'd just enjoy being young making out cuddling that sort of thing, no need to involve the adult stuff just yet.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 November 2014): My opinion? Wait till you're at least 18 for ANY kind of sex. The reality is pregnancy CAN happen. I waited till I was 21 because at that point I was done with college and had an income and knew that if something unexpected DID happen, I would be able to handle it.
I know this isn't for everyone, but it worked for me...
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A
male
reader, Forge  +, writes (10 November 2014):
 Don't play "touchy-feely" if you know what I mean. No sex, no acts of adultery, etc. You should only take it as far as making out, but nothing more.
I'm only a year older than you, and I've had a few girlfriends. Trust me, making out is where it stops, at MAX.
-Førg€
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