A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend is a Marine and gets extremely jealous even at the thought of another guy flirting with me. We are many states apart and I obviously have the occasional worry of girls hitting on him. However, he takes it to another level. He is convinced that many guys hit on me and ask me out even when I tell him it is not the case. He has told me several times that he will call any guy that is "bothering" me.I have never cheated on him in the past nor on any of my previous boyfriends and he knows this. I've never given him any reason to doubt me. He cheated on his previous girlfriend and swears it was a one time thing. Is this because he distrusts me? Or is it because he is genuinely concerned of losing me to another guy while he's away?
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male
reader, dirtball +, writes (18 January 2011):
 "Is this because he distrusts me?"
Not just you, he doesn't trust anyone. Especially other men.
"Or is it because he is genuinely concerned of losing me to another guy while he's away?"
It's more of a control issue. He wants to be in control of you. His constant doubting of you makes you try to more adamantly prove your trustworthy nature. It's a way of seeking reassurance while at the same time controlling you.
If you ask me, these aren't good signs. It's up to you what you want to do, but if you do leave him, you NEED to tell him why. Be blunt and honest, he needs to hear it.
A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (18 January 2011):
 You know I think it's Marines in general. I know not all Marines, but quite a bit. I was engaged to one who always thought I was cheating, and extremely jealous when other guys talked to me, even my guy friends. Well pretty soon his outta control distrust, controlling nature, and possessiveness drove me away.
Your track record is clean, there is no reason for him to not trust you. His track record is not so much. If anything he would be the one to cheat since this has been the case in the past. However, be careful of his possessive controlling nature. It will get way out of hand down the road.
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A
male
reader, BrownWolf  +, writes (18 January 2011):
And you see this jealousy as a good thing, so you still around to defend yourself.
Do you see the warning sign here, or are you one of those that will be saying that line we here so often... "I should have..."
Love and jealousy can not live under the same roof.
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A
female
reader, Honeygirl  +, writes (18 January 2011):
 Sorry Sweet, but when a partner starts accusing the other partner of cheating... well... its usually the accusing partner that is trying to deflect attention away from themselves while THEY are cheating.
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