A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:question for the men on here..Are men put off by women who have given birth? either because they watched their partner give birth which has put them off sex and can't get the image of their head of seeing partner being stretched and watching something come out of her vagina.or are men put off sex because their partner's vagina's arent as tight as someone who hasn't given birth?if so, how common is this?I've had a discussion about this with a male friend and i'm not sure whether his views are common amongst men generally or not?Thanks
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 May 2012): Most men are happy to have you and the baby, and take any changes to your body in their stride. And if you end up one day having sex with a guy who is not the father of the child or children that you had, he will surely want you, and not bother about you having given birth.
A
female
reader, dmartin89 +, writes (8 May 2012):
 xgod - you get stretchmarks or you dont, no amount of cream or exercise will prevent it! Some creams help to moisturize the skin so stretch marks are less itchy and uncomfortable but they cannot prevent! The appearance of stretch marks can be recuded to silvery lines but the only way to remove them is with surgery.
As a bisexual woman - I am not put off my women who have had childeren or who have stretch marks. They are a natural part of life! If women in media wernt so airbrushed then maybe would be seen as being more normal than it currently is. Bear in mind that stretch marks can also be gained from growing up, putting on/losing weight/gaining muscle.
Also with enough effort, vagina's can be even tighter than before giving birth! Buy some weighted balls or even just do your kegals!
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A
male
reader, xgod  +, writes (8 May 2012):
 The thing that most disturbs me is the stretch marks. Some women get them, some women are lucky enough to not get them.I know that the skin stretches to accommodate the growing baby, but there are safe creams and lotions and vitamins which can be applied to the skin to reduce or eliminate stretch marks before and after a woman gives birth.My own sister has shown me her stretch marks and it just freaks me out. Of course, she has had 3 kids (two of them 8 and a half months apart) but has begun using Vitamin K lotions and her stretch marks are almost gone after a year of treatment.Besides that, for me, a woman must be able to reduce or lose the baby fat. With my own wife, who has yet to have a child, I will encourage her to join me at the gym and we can both get into continually better shape.For the most part, there are exercises and techniques for tightening up the areas that were stretched by the pregnancy and birth.http://ccherb.com/blog/how-to-flatten-stomach-after-childbirth/
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A
female
reader, oldbag +, writes (4 May 2012):
 WellIf they were there would be hundreds of millions of women worldwide with no partner and only one child
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (4 May 2012):
 Whether or not a woman has given birth is really not of much importance to guys.Whether or not she is a nice/warm/personable/loveable woman IS important....Try to be one of the latter.... and don't give it a second thought if you are one of the former.....
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A
male
reader, no nonsense Aidan +, writes (4 May 2012):
Look at how many men go on to have other children with their partners after the birth of the first child, and how many men date women with children from past relationships. As with all these kinds of discussions, the male and female populations are both such large groups that it’s pretty impossible to identify any norm for either men or women, we just have to come back to the fact that everyone’s different. There will, I’m sure, be men who are put off by witnessing child birth, others who will not be, and still others who do not want children in their lives because they don’t have the desire to be a parent, rather than because of the child birth process itself.
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A
male
reader, Odds +, writes (4 May 2012):
 Some men, yeah, but I wouldn't put a number on that except to say its probably a minority. I can't find it right now, but I recall a study some years back that showed some men had a hard time seeing their wives sexually after seeing them give birth. Interesting, but I mostly ignored it because the men were all self-selected. The point being that they wanted to change and see their wives the way they used to, and were seeking help (the study was reported in some online paper or another, and the comments about those men were more than a little unkind).
Granted, that's only the narrow case of men seeing their wives give birth; your question covers men's views of any women having given birth. Could be different there, but the point being that it's not unheard of for some men to be put off.
It also may not be a birth thing, so much as a kid thing - for instance, I've never dated anyone who had kids, partly because I do not want to. But that's mostly about single mothers and children, who I do not want to get entangled with, and not about the birthing process itself.
So yeah, some men might take issue, but it's the exception, not the rule, and most of them probably don't want to be turned off by it, they just are.
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A
male
reader, MikeEa1  +, writes (4 May 2012):
 not for me. I'm a 50 odd yo and I expect most women will have given birth. i am not disgusted by their vaginas or attracted to ones whose vaginas have not given birth. in fact I only worry about a woman of my age who hasn't had a long term relationship because that probably means they can't do it. nothing else matters. actually maybe in my 20-30ies this may have been something but not important.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (4 May 2012):
 I've had two children and neither their father or any partners i had after the birth of my kids...
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A
male
reader, dougbcoll +, writes (4 May 2012):
 as with me i am not put off by a woman that has given birth. after my wife gave birth to our kids, i desired her just as much as before the births.
i think it effected her more so , she was not willing to let me give her oral for a long time after our first was born.
i have to say "no" i am not turned off.my desire has not changed any.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 May 2012): Ok yes to both but if a man loves u and u give birth he should feel bad about u in pain there's rwason like maybe he's scaried to hurt if he has sex or to get u prego again as well but men do find that weird and they do get images I no some men like that its not that its so streched out tho it may feel different and like there lil in it witch makes a man feel as if he is tiny witch can make them feel bad kind of stupid but some men r like that as well it just deppends on the male but that's another reason y a lot of women these days take a c section
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