A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:I want to know why I am so unattractive to women! After getting divorced 3 years ago, I have never had any interest from decent women. I have tried several dating sites and ended up being scammed twice, losing a lot of money from fake women. As for the rest of them, I never get any replies to any messages. I am ignored when I offer to chat and it is obvious that it is impossible now to find anyone nice! When commenting on this do not think I am being choosy! It is women today who will not accept traditional values of honesty and loyalty. Trying to date today is a joke, because no matter how women describe themselves, or pretend to want a good honest guy, they want a pre-constructed man over 5'9, good looking, wealthy and stronger than Atlas.I didn't realise until recently that I was so unattractive to women. I am a real ugly, short man, I am never appreciated, never understood and have no true friends. Also, I have never had any confidence in life to do anything. Walking into a crowded room of strangers is more terrifying to me than jumping out of a plane without a parachute.Women, you will all tell me, like confident men. However, does any woman today have any feelings or empathy with someone like me? No.At 50 years of age, I cannot continue to feel rejected and go through the rest of my life like this. Now, I refuse to socialise, because I feel more alone in company than I do on my own. I hate life as it is, and no longer care about being honest, loyal caring etc as they count for nothing today. There is nobody to turn to now, so I ask here what, if any, is my next move? And please, don't lecture me as I do have a smidgen of dignity left!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all for your help. The only criticism is that of branding people using the internet as lacking social skills lol!! The very reason it is difficult for someone like me is the lack of social skills from people in real life, particilarly women! Also there are actually many confident people on dating sites on the internet-though most are WAY too confident!! But it is useful for some, and there are decent people there, so DON'T make such sweeping statements based on your personal opinion and not FACT!!! And as for Facebook, like it or not, it's here to stay (I suspect MOST people on THIS site have used Facebook!!!).One more point is that people who are now happy on their own have the compensation that at least someone has liked them at sometime. This has NEVER happened for me.Thank you "create your peace". Yours was the most thoughtful answer. I'm really sorry you were treated badly.My marriage failed because of money, trying to live a life I could not to make my wife happy! good luck to you and thanks.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2010): Don't give up. Keep looking, not all women are liers and cheaters. Have you ever consider joining a support group. you can go on the web and find a local support group filled with man who go through the same challengs you are. I bet you would feel more comforable with people who are experiencing the same thing you are. Life is filled with evil and wrongings, but the cracks in life are filled with good people with good solid honestity.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2010): Create your space. What a wonderful, wonderful answer. OP take heed, she is spot on.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2010): Your next move...don't chase so hard, let a good woman fall into you. Build your confidence, take on hobbies that allow you to meet people. A creative writing class, crafts, painting etc. Now, you've learned from past experiences how less than decent people can take advantage of and hurt you. You can now avoid them and be more wary. I'm 18, 5'9, curvy, and pretty (as some have told me :p). My boyfriend is 34, bald, barely 5'8 and a little chubby-none of my friends my age or older find him attractive and I love him so, so much it hurts at times. We found each other on pof. I was just there to help a friend and he messaged me...I was intrigued but did not think it'd ever work. 8months later...we're in love. You just never know! Meanwhile, work on what you feel is so unattractive about yourself and try to enjoy life!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2010): First of all, you need to stop beating yourself up over women not finding you attractive. This shows lack of confidence, which no woman will go for. Also, you've only tried dating online? I highly disagree that you should be basing your self-esteem level on this. People on the internet do not have the social skills nor the confidence to meet people in real life. The internet is based off of lies and B.S. You can create yourself a desirable person in your mind and then project that onto others without even really trying. Why do you think so many long-distant or internet relationships fail? People online are not at all who they paint themselves to be in real life. Even Facebook doesn't give us the full image of who a person truly is. No one is going to post their worst fears, flaws, and mistakes to their family, friends, and co-workers. It's just not smart. As far as meeting new women, try going to social events, or Singles' gatherings. Meet people for who they truly are, and not who they would like to pretend to be. Good luck =)
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