A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'm almost 24, and I've never been in a relationship, nor have I ever been approached by women. Part of this is because I've never tried flirting with girls due to my inability to keep conversations going, but I believe the big reason is because I don't look my age; I mean, I could probably pass for a sixteen year-old or a high school freshman (I'm about 5'5" and have a baby-face, I suppose), so as a result, my shyness and appearance give off a 'little brother' vibe, not just around girls, but everyone. So my question is, even if I knew how to talk to the opposite sex, would you girls go out with a guy if he looked way younger than his age? Do any guys have this same problem? I wonder what it'll be like when I hit 30 and still look this way :(
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2008): Hey dude i just wanted to let you know i have the same problem its like if i was writing what you wrote, i actually searched to see if people had this same problem and your blog came up. Well im 20 going on 21 and i pass for a sixteen yearold or 17 yr old. This makes it harder to approach women and have relationships I mean i think i always have that in the back of my mind when i see or talk to a girl who i would like to start a relationship with i start to observe and if i see a the guys she surrounds herself with and if they look way older than me it shys me away, and i put myself in situations where i end up becoming a friend instead of what i originally planned to do, i need a girls honest opinion on what a guy who looks much younger than he is to do in a situation like this?
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (25 June 2008):
Yep everyone else is right - the fact that you look younger is no a problem, the fact that you act younger is.
You say you can't keep a converstaion going... well you need to work on that. Ask lots of questions keep talking, you'll find it easier once your confidence grows.
Just start chatting and see what happens.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, happytochat  +, writes (25 June 2008):
Hey,
I dont think a girl would turn down a guy just because he looks younger then what he is. In fact, I think it would be great to date somoene who looks alot younger because if you get married to the guy, when he turns 50, he'll still look really young and hot! lol.
But if a girl sees you and thinks you look young, and doesnt realise you are over 16, then she might not approach you. But if she knew you just looked young but were really 24, i dont see that stopping her.
My sister is the same age as you, 24, and she looks like shes 16 too! But I guess being a girl she can wear makeup which helps.
Have you tried looking at the style of clothes you wear? Try wearing sophisticated clothes to make you look older. Also take a look at your hairstyle, some hair styles can make you loko younger then others. Talk about it with your hairdresser as they will know what works and what doesnt. Also think about facial hair. You could try growing sme as a 16 year old would have trouble doing this. But keep in mind some women might not find this attractive so that could be a drawback.
As for your 'inability' to have conversations with females. Dont think of it as an ibability, because everyone has the ability to do it, it just might be harder for others. Alot of people find ith ard talkign to the opposite sex at some point in there life, but some take longer to work it out. So dont be disheartened, its something you can learn! There are alot of good books and web sites out there that deal with shyness and communicating with the oppposite sex. Since Im no expert and dont have the time to write about it all, I suggest you try searching the web for some more info written by professionals :)
Hope this has helped, dont give up!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 June 2008): It's all about confidence baby doll. I myself wouldn't have a problem on dating a man that looked younger...Just as long as he carried himself as a man. Good luck. And God Bless
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A
female
reader, Star_07 +, writes (25 June 2008):
 Its not as much about looks, its more about how you carry yourself. If you are confident and "sure of yourself" then I dont think you will have a problem finding dates!
It's okay to be shy but you need to try to step out of your comfort zone sometimes. Dont worry about the flirting, just try to talk about what you kind of things you like and what you are interested in but also be willing to talk about things that others are interested in. It might feel awkward at first, but keep trying! Eventually you will find a girl who you will hit it off with....
If it is your looks you are really worried about, maybe you could change your style of clothes. If you have a baby face, definately dont dress like a teenager!
I hope this helps and good luck!
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A
female
reader, Tremor +, writes (25 June 2008):
 My boyfriend is 21 and can still pass for 16. I find it quite endearing. =)
I'd say your key problem here is confidence. Acting shy around women is a characteristic often associated with teenage boys, and teaming that with a young appearance will just enhance this perception. Acting like an older, more experienced guy, on the other hand, will cause people to focus on your more mature features. I've always found that people, to an extent, tend to mould the physical appearance of others on what they know of their personality. It's probably some psychological thing.
And I wouldn't worry about when you hit thirty - you'll look 22 and will be able to pick up the younger ladies. =)
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