A
female
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anonymous
writes:My husband posts pictures of himself online (he works for a prominent news site and they have headshots next to articles) and he picks the most awful images of himself - like images that have been distorted because of a camera angle so his head looks extra fat at the top and totally narrow down by his chin, or vice versa. (At first I thought it was funny, but it's not anymore!)I'm not shallow, I don't care what he looks like when we go out (he's worn a t-shirt with stains and holes all in it and I don't care - I love him for him). But, I am afraid that it's going to reflect badly on him when people go to read his articles. Like they won't give him any credibility or something. And when people who support the organization go to his office, his boss makes him dress up in a collared shirt and tie. So in turn I'm afraid he's eventually going to have reprecussions at work. He keeps saying that if anything happens, then it's the other person that has the problem. To an extent I agree with him, but in the business world things don't work like that. I don't want him to lose out on promotions and stuff because of this.I'm a photographer and I made him some great shots to use, but he refuses. When he picks out the bad pictures that he uses, he laughs about it and thinks it's funny.Does anyone have any suggestions? Or do you guys think I'm overreacting (that's what I'm hoping!).
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 October 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionAnther photographer? Well, maybe. I could try that.
"...think about it as in professional wrestling" lol :)
Thanks again!
A
male
reader, Frank B Kermit  +, writes (18 October 2006):
 You are welcome, and thanks for taking the time to post a response.
The reason that I suggested another photographer is that, as a man, he might be insecure about using his wifes photos (some guys are weak and do not want to feel like they need their wives help, if you know what I mean).
But if he is as supportive as you say, then it is also possible that his appearance might be a part of the persona is has built...think about it as in professional wrestling.
Take care.
-Frank B Kermit
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHey - thanks for the advice, Frank. But really I don't think about it in the way of ruining my reputation. I just don't want him to get hurt in the work place or be held back because of something stupid like people not being able to see past appearances (since, sadly, that's how our society runs).
I've also made him some great shots (I have a degree in photography and do photo work as my career), but he gets a kick out of using the other ones.
Oh, well. I think I'll just leave him alone like you had suggested. You're right - as long as he stays employed and gets the work, then I shouldn't worry about it. I mean, it's not like he's really hurting anyone.
It's different to hear from an outside perspective. Thank you.
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male
reader, Frank B Kermit +, writes (18 October 2006):
As long as he stays employed, then leave it alone. As long as he gets the work, then leave it alone. I think you are more worried how it is affecting your repuation, not his.
As it stands, you obivously find him credible enough...you married him.
If you just can not let this go, then consider that for the holidays or his next birthday is coming so, make your present to him to be a paid photo shoot with a photographer for classic head shots.
-Frank B Kermit
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