A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend and I have been together for 2.5 months but we've known each other and been very close friends for four years before that. We've been having sex since the second day we started dating and I got her pregnant just about five weeks ago. Emotionally and physically, I'm ready to step up as a dad and help support this child. Financially, however, I'm effing lost.My girlfriend (who will be my wife New Year's Day - already proposed, she accepted, and I gave her a ring) is more concerned about how I feel about all of this. I'm in love with her and I'm ready for this (I'm the kind of guy whose mentality is "enjoy the crime, do the time").My problem is that my mind is racing with questions. Will I be a good father? Will I be able to support this kid until he (or she) is 18? Will I be a good husband and love my wife the way I'm supposed to? How am I going to get a college degree now? Should I get second and third jobs? Will I ever have a guys' night out again? How does my wife feel about this? And so many more...Please... someone make sense of this. I'm going to be a dad in eight months! Weird to say that... Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 September 2010): It's nice to see a guy willing to step up to the plate in a situation like this, so first off, good job. Now, as for your questions, if you feel that you will need the money, then yes, another job would be good. Three, however, would be tiring and in an already stressful situation, you don't need that. As for your college degree, maybe once the baby is born and you feel more stable, then you can go back to college, if you feel like staying in college would be too much of a burden now. If you feel like you will still be able to stay in college, than I say go for it; it would only make your kid proud in the future knowing his or her father is an educated man.
As for how you're going to treat your to-be-wife, well that is all going to depend on you, isn't it? Do you trust yourself to treat her the way she deserves to be treated? You seem like a nice guy from your post, so I'm guessing you will. Guy's nights out probably will not be nearly as frequent, as you will need to help your wife out with the child, but I'm sure there will be chances for you to go out.
Just try your best to do everything the way you think is right, and I'm sure things will turn out fine. I'm sure this is a very exciting time in your life, so enjoy it. :)
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