A
male
age
30-35,
*upus
writes:Ok here goes... Im not going to just show one side of the story here because this is all my fault...I split up with my girlfriend of 3 years in december 2012 because i thought i didnt love her anymore. I started hanging around with another girl 2-3 weeks after we broke up. This other girl we cuddled on the couch as we watched a film and i almost went on a date with her. I said to her i would want to be with her in the future but it was too soon after breaking up with my ex.Then I realised i still loved my Ex, it was quite overwhelming to be honest. I love her with all my heart and i totally regret braking up with her. Biggest mistake of my life, she is an amazing woman who i dont deserve. The guilt for hanging around with this other girl is also unbearable and i regret everything.Anyways my ex took me back and said that we'll work on things. A couple of weeks ago she said whether i wanted to hold off getting back together for a bit so I could get everything sorted out, because I just moved house and had no money. Was under a lot of stress so i said ok. Were still sleeping together and seeing eachother almost every day.Now, every sunday she has started going to another guys house to watch films. The guy is a customer at her work and is single. She goes to his alone and has never invited me along with her. Im trying to win her back but she keeps going to his every sunday and it hurts. Yeah i hurt her because of this other girl. Shes not a slag or anything, she lost her virginity to me. Everytime i say to her im not comfortable with her going round to another guys house every sunday to watch films(even though she said she doesnt know what she'd do without me), she gets all angry and says they're just friends and they're not attracted to eachother. She says hes not good looking either. When i say im not confortable with it she also says that he is the only friend she has outside work apart from me, and that she cant spend all of her time with me. She calls me sexist when i mention that shes going round to a single guys house and shes a woman on her own.I dont know what to do. I love her but shes making it so hard by going to his house regardless. I said its like your dating him instead but she said no. She said if he started cooking her meals then yeah it would be a bit iffy. But i know this sunday hes going to cook her a meal. (im at my parents house in another city over the easter weekend)What do i do?(p.s sorry its so long)
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Lupus +, writes (31 March 2013):
Lupus is verified as being by the original poster of the question So I told her that she needs to consider my feelings otherwise I said our relationship isn't going to work, so she's said she'll stop going round to his. She also found out that I took an engagement ring heirloom that was passed down to her, and that I'm getting it secretly resized to fit her finger. I was going to surprise her with it to prove how I feel. When she asked was I going to propose I said I don't know because I don't know 100% how she feels about me. She replied;
"I would say yes".
A
male
reader, Lupus +, writes (27 March 2013):
Lupus is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI'll keep you all updated as I'm going to do my best to get her back completely, guess I'm just going to have to sit tight and wait
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (26 March 2013):
 SURE they're "just friends"....
AND, it don't rain in Indianapolis in the Summer time...
Good luck...
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (26 March 2013):
 I'm sorry but if she goes to her friend every sunday to watch films why can't you go too? why aren't you his friend too?
I am sorry to say this but I think there may be more than just friends here...
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2013): I think she is being honest and just needs friendship.
When you split up she obviously developed a friendship with this man, and realised she had few friends. Her loyalty to him now you are back together, by not dumping him shows she is a genuine person. I would try and feel more secure and let it go got a while.
If it was a girl you would accept it better. Maybe it's time to trust her and enjoy being back together.
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