A
female
age
26-29,
*ptongirl3112
writes:I don't know what to do ... Me and my neighbour shane both really like each other. When he first came round mine a few days ago we snogged and ended up naked in bed together but we didn't have sex . He came round last night again and more stuff happened. He told me he wants to wait a while till we have sex. but I think his penis was a tiny bit inside me and it really hurt. Even when he fingered me it hurt. So we had to stop I am worried I have wrecked everything between us. Will the pain stop if we keep trying or is there a prob x
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 May 2011): It's too soon to tell if there's a problem. I had a problem with painful sex and years later I found out it was because my hymen hadn't broken on it's own (as it does the first time you have sex). The skin was too thick. I had to have it surgically removed and now I'm fine.
You'll have to try full sex a FEW times before you know if there's a physical problem. Hope this helps.
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (6 May 2011):
 It doesn't sound like you are using protection!!! Why not? If you do not use protection you will soon have bigger issues to worry about than whether or not sex will ruin your friendship/fling.
No glove no love. No penis tips should be inside you, or rub up against your vagina, unless it has a condom on it. Be strict with this, it is your body and health and future at risk after all. You'll be the one stuck with the kid and no education, not him. Boys are horrible at using protection, you need to take responsibility yourself.
As for the sex, yes it will hurt less the more you go at it. What are you worried about having ruined between the two of you?
But be clear, do you want a casual fling with him, or do you want a relationship? If you are in love, or like him very much, and want a relationship, then you need to tell him so and make that relationship happen. Otherwise, for all you know, he's out there snuggling and feeling up any number of other girls, possibly bringing STI's back home to you. Do not let him use you. Women use sex to show how much they love the man they are with. Men on the other hand just enjoy sex, and don't always attach emotions to the action. Him snuggling with you does NOT mean that he likes you. It could be he just likes the snuggles and the prospect of sex. So be certain that you and him are at the same level here. If you want a relationship, tell him you want to be his girlfriend and exclusive, or else you wont go further with him. If he truly does like you back in that way, he will agree to be your boyfriend. If he doesn't want to be your boyfriend you will know he just wanted you for sex. Better to know before you give up your virginity to him, than after.
Be responsible above all. If you do not have sex with this boy, trust me, there will be others.
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A
female
reader, Miamine +, writes (6 May 2011):
 It worries me a bit that you are having sex but don't know anything about it. That's dangerous. I hope he was wearing a condom to protect you from pregnancy and sexual disease. You two aren't even a couple, so I don't think a baby would be sensible at this time.
You don't sound like you've had sex before. Sex is painful for females. Many girls have a hymen and this gets torn by the penis and causes some girls a lot of pain. There may also be blood. Even if you don't have a hymen (some women loose their by doing sports or are not born with one) sex is painful because your vagina is stretched in a way it's not used too. Yes eventually it will become comfortable, but you must have lots of foreplay to become totally aroused. Some women find it takes months or even years before sex becomes comfortable, that's because they and their partner haven't found what turns them on.
If you are having sex, please get contact your GP or your family planning clinic. They will give you free contraception, advice on sex and your body and will also give you a smear test to prevent cervical cancer. (not sure if you've been injected against this)
PS: Guy wants to wait.. he sounds kinda nice. Don't worry he understands about your pain and knows a hell of a lot more about sex than you do.
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A
female
reader, lovesucks2011  +, writes (6 May 2011):
It seems like the guy only comes around for sex,and only said he enter to wait cuz he knows girls like that. It'll stop hurting the 2nd or 3rd time after fully being in and pops your cherry+,bleed. You prolly have a tough cherry,wich is not uncommon. Just wait till your ready or you'll regret it!
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