A
female
age
22-25,
*ammycap
writes:So my boyfriend well ex dumped me around two weeks ago out of the blue and of course i broke the no contact rule and texted him like five days after but it's been a week since we last communicated, But he left due to stress and his life being a mess and not being able to deal with both of us and needing to be alone. Do you think theres a possibility of him returning as im still his profile picture on instagram and he checks my story on there every so often and he said he still loves me.Please help.
View related questions:
text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Dionee'  +, writes (10 May 2018):
 This seems permanent. Sorry.
It's best to just break contact COMPLETELY and focus on more important things because you're at a crucial age.
You're young and there will be plenty of time later on to date and experience relationships. Don't be in a rush and don't force for things to happen when it isn't the time for them to. Respect his wishes and yourself by leaving him alone. Your time will come.
A
female
reader, cammycap +, writes (9 May 2018):
cammycap is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI also forgot to add in im still his wallpaper and asks our friends about me and said he doesn't think we'll get back together but you never know, and the past two days hes called my phone rung five times then he hung up but i chose to not answer as im not fully healed and hasn't asked for his stuff back and i havent asked for mine either. Also thanks for all the answers I am respecting his space.
...............................
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (9 May 2018):
 Probably not.
If he is having so much on his plate that he can't handle both stress AND a GF - he has already chosen to focus on the stress, not the GF. And if this is stress over school, career, sports etc. then that SHOULD be his focus NOT a GF.
IF you are both 16-18 you are both in High School and/or on the way to college/work programs/internships, which means you two might end up at different collages in different states.
If he has asked for no contact you should respect it.
Work on moving on, don't sit on the shelf and wait for him to decide if he is coming back to you or not. ACCEPT that he probably isn't.
Spend time with friends and family. Enjoy the coming summer.
...............................
A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (9 May 2018):
 Stress: There was stress before the relationship, it didn't stop him then. In the US at this time of the year teens are at peak stress. Stress can cause depression or anxiety and make holding down a relationship difficult.
Life being a mess: Assuming that he is about your age, or likely a bit older. This could very well mean that he is preparing to go to university, in another city, with new and exciting people. Or it could just mean that he is looking for a summer job because having a girlfriend is a lot more expensive than he thought it would be.
Not being able to deal with both of us: This tends to indicate that he is done putting up with some aspect of your personality. The nicer possible translation is that when you are with him, he is not comfortable with himself.
Needing to be alone: 3 possible interpretations. He is an introvert and you don't allow him enough alone time to recharge. He feels he is losing his individuality by merging with you. Or. He needs some time without you watching him to try out a new partner (this is very common).
Nothing he is saying (including "I still love you") indicates that this is a short term break. Most of it looks like letting you down gently, because he does genuinely care about you.
The no contact rule is not a ploy to win him back (although that is sometimes the result). It is so you can emotionally detach, before you try for a new relationship, with someone else. It is a good time to work on your own hobbies and interests, and to be your best self.
FA
...............................
A
male
reader, N91  +, writes (9 May 2018):
 If you break up, the likelihood of getting back together is very slim.
You broke up for a reason. Whether you think it’s good or bad is irrelevant, he doesn’t want to be with you. If you were meant to be you wouldn’t break up and I know that you’re young but this is something you will learn in time.
Not everyone we meet or speak to is right for us and in time they show that with how they act and how they treat us. This guy has decided he has too much on his plate to have a GF at the same time. Respect his decision and leave him be. Move on and find someone who has time for you.
...............................
|
