A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:This will probably sound like a dumb question, but will I ever find a partner who is better in bed than my ex was? First I want to be perfectly clear that sex is not the only thing that matters to me. I'm single right now, but if given the choice I would sooner have a happy, loving relationship ahead of just amazing sex with someone. I just want to have the best of both again. I loved my last partner a great deal and she was so enthusiastic in the bedroom it really made the sex amazing. I've just turned 23, so I know I'm still young and will probably have plenty more sexual partners (I've slept with 8 women in my life so far), my most recent partner wasn't my first love or anything so I know I've felt like this before, so am I just being irrational? Why am I finding it hard to believe I'll find a better partner in a romantic AND a sexual sense? I'm just really worried that I won't. Am I crazy?
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThat's great advice everyone, thanks. I feel like this from time to time and while I usually manage to snap myself out of it, it's nice to have the support. I'm hopeful I will find somebody better, I only wish I could believe that I will every hour of the day, but sometimes I just can't. Time will tell.
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (16 June 2011):
 You might... you might not. It's really hard to say. Sexual interaction can also be improved over the years, but it can also go bad. It swings both ways, but yuo just got to try your best to find someone who you are compatible with and enjoy on a personal level, and then treat the sex as a bonus. It all depends on whats important to you. You might not ever find someone who's as great in bed as your ex, or you might find someone who's even better. But, word of advice, don't ever let your new gf's know how good/bad your ex's were in bed. Especially not if your ex's were better! White lies are perfectly acceptable in this department.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2011): So, why are you no longer with her?
Obviously something wasn't right there, or she wouldn't be "the past".
I agree with prior poster, don't try to recreate the past, live the future and make the best of what you find in the person you love.
When you find the person you love, it is all "the best". If you are comparing, you aren't being fair.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2011): Yes, give it time.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2011): THere are MANY, vivacious, energetic young women out there who are loving AND very sexual. You will find one...probably many. The key is to be happy, be confident and look closely for traits in both loving, caring nature in a woman as well as indicators of being open sexually, and you will find her. Just dont compare to your ex, because all relationships, just like all people, are different. reinvent your joy...dont try to recreate it.
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