A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My wife cheated on me a few weeks ago, we are working through it and i really do want this to work. The problem is not when we are together but when we are apart. I cant stop thinking about it! How do i stop and move on? This is starting to chew me up inside!!!
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cheated on me, move on Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (7 September 2012): Cerberus is right on this. You can slave away and try and make things work, whilst constantly feeling insecure for the term of your relationship, or you can move on.
People always over estimate the short term and underestimate the long term. In saying that I think that you would think that the short term agony would be too much to bare, but you could handle a smaller amount of grief over the long term while hoping it will get better.
Having been on the receiving end of this trust me go cold turkey. I regret taking my ex back. I couldn't 'fix' her and I look at her with rose coloured glasses. Please dont make my mistake.
I would hazard a guess that 90% of people who have left a cheating spouse are better because of it. Play the odds on this one and move on.
A
male
reader, doublejack +, writes (24 August 2012):
OP, I have to agree completely with Cerberus. My ex-wife cheated on me, and that is why she is my ex. I caught her once, forgave her and attempted to pick up the pieces, and caught her again 3 years later. From what I learned during that experience I would not even attempt to try making the relationship work, I would end it.
If you really want to save the relationship, you will need the help of a professional. I suggest both individual and couples sessions. You'll have to work through everything to move past it, and it won't be easy. I feel for you, knowing what you must be feeling right now.
Best of luck!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 August 2012): The fragile threat of trust is broken and that is difficult to repair,the betrayal will run deep and only time can heal it but you can't stop it and move on, no more than you can forget she cheated, it will always be there unfortunately
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 August 2012): "How do i stop and move on?"
You can't just flick a switch and turn it off OP, you have to tough it out and give it time. I would really go to marriage counselling though OP, perhaps make sense of the why's and how you can move forward with professional help is the key here.
I wish you luck, cheating is horrible thing and I wouldn't even bother trying to make it work I'd be gone.
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