A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I just found out last monday that my boyfriend has been going on craigslist having sex with men/transexuals and answering heterosexual personal adds from women. When I confronted him, at first he responded by saying he didn't know why he did it, that he was just online looking and that he did love me. Then I told him I was not talking about the hetero ads, I was talking about him having sex with men, sometimes even paying for it, he stopped all communication with me and we have not spoken since. I just found out through a friend of mine that he has put a brand new add on craiglist looking to date "honest, committment ready, Christian women". He is totally still pretending to be straight. I have no interest in ever seeing this man again. He knew that I had been cheated on before and I always told him that if he ever wanted out, all he had to do was say it.. I even told him he could break up with me via text msg if he felt he couldn't do it face to face. He started getting emotionally distant from me lately and I would always ask him if he was ok, did he need a break was there anything he wanted to talk about. He always said no, that he was just stressed from work. Even though we had stopped having sex within the last two months (we dated for 4 1/2 months) he was still affectionate when we were together (kisses, hugs, cuddling) and he always said he loved me and would never cheat or lie to me. This guy was such a goodie-two shoes. He didn't curse, smoke, or drink. He plays in his church's choir and only listens to gospel music. He is divorced with three kids that he loves so much. He often told me that his kids and I were his only bit of happiness, that the rest of his life was so lonely. I guess now I know why. His craigslist life is SOOO different from his regular life. I had reached out to him to let him know that I was hurt, but forgave him and just wanted talk to him to get some closure. He never responded. I was hoping to get an apology but I don't think I ever will. I feel so used and like it was all a lie. What I wanna know is, why would he not even apologize and why is he back on there looking for another woman to date? He knows he likes men, why do some closeted men go from woman to woman? Was I just his cover or "beard"? Why didn't he just dump me before I found out? Could he have really loved me and just couldn't let go? It is so hard to see this cold side of him, because the man I knew was nothing like that.
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a break, christian, divorce, text Reply to this Question
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male
reader, GrimmReality +, writes (17 August 2009):
 Get rid of him.....he is trying to convince you and himself that he is not gay. But in fact he is.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2009): He's doing this beacuase he hasn't accepted himself as gay - these woman are not only being used, they are in danger.
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