A
female
age
30-35,
*attobella
writes: I have been dating my boyfriend for a little under a month. We went on numerous dates and took things very slow before that, so all in all it has been about 3 months. Our first conversation lasted 6 hours...and I learned that he has full custody of an adorable 2 year old boy and an ex wife. We were very open and honest about everything, I know all about his past and he knows everything about mine. We have similar goals, the same outlook on life, and he has almost every single quality I could wish for in a boyfriend. I understand the fact that he has to talk to, and interact with his ex wife to raise their son. I am not going to push away his son's real mother, despite the fact that she has never really been there for him. Even though he is 2 he deserves to have her in his life. The only problem is that he is insecure with the fact that I'm okay with this. I don't understand at all.He hasn't come out and said that he doesn't believe me, but whenever the topic comes up it's touchy. Lately he has either been avoiding it completely, or he is extra concerned and questions me about my feelings about the subject.What on earth could this mean? I never thought that being understanding would get me in trouble...But I really want this one to work out. What should I do?
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female
reader, QuirkLady +, writes (26 May 2010):
It sounds like he is projecting his feelings onto you. He isn't okay with dealing with her and he wants to believe you have the same problem.
I'd let him know that I understand his feelings and why he feels that way. Keep on being understanding, as I feel that's the best way for you both.
Good luck.
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