A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Why do I get so horny thinking about my girlfriend being pleased by another guy
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2021): I think a lot of people like to watch others have sex. What are the chances Ward and June next door will let you watch them go at it? 0! What are the chances you can hook up your girlfriend with some handsome guy, maybe on vacation were couples break some rules -- like copulating on the beach -- Now there's sex to fantasize about. But keep it just that.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2021): Men who want to share their women never let it fizzle out, the fantasy is far too strong. The sad thing is that they get obsessed with it and want it done at all costs, with no thought to their poor woman. A total lack of respect towards her. They don't think of any of the things that could happen to her body or feelings if she were to be with another man, nor how disgusted she would feel to be used like that. If she wanted that crap she would be far better off dumping her guy and selling sex to guys she likes the looks of as and when she fancies it. She would not need his permission. The other thing about cuckolds is they also expect their wife/girlfriend to go through it all blow by blow after it has happened, making it sound wonderful, like a sex tape, or letting the guy watch. The fantasies grow they do not diminish. It will start with one guy and then be two etc. It will start with straight sex and then be dangerous sex etc. All the while the woman is treated as a toy. Every time he says anything to his woman along the ones of I DO NOT RESPECT YOU, YOU ARE JUST A TOY THERE TO PLEASURE ME some of the feelings she has for him die. She starts to loath him, feel disgusted by him. Most women feel sick of the idea of loveless sex, or doing it to pleasure her guy so no matter how much the guy goes on about it it rarely happens. But what is guaranteed to happen is that the woman sees him in a new light. A nasty selfish immature light. A
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2021): As a therapist I know that most men who fantasise about this would love it to happen in real life. But few of them have looked at the whole picture and realised the huge risks they would be taking and the damage it would do to their relationship, plus the total lack of respect it shows for their woman. The reason it rarely happens in real life is because women don't want to be a sexual object for strangers to enjoy, if they did they would become well paid prostitutes, where they decide who, when where and what.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2021): This topic comes-up here at DC over and over. Often from the same OP.
If you want to keep your girlfriend, you won't gamble with your relationship.
Women usually tie emotion to sex. Of course, there are many who don't; but for the most part, they do. If you start introducing your woman to random men to make love to her, you're in-effect being her wingman/pimp. You may be introducing her to her next boyfriend, or future husband. It might start-out just as you might hope, a big turn-on; but human emotions are unpredictable. People connect, and the next thing you know...she's seeing the guy! Usually, it starts behind your back. Jealousy, or your insecurities may surface; if it turns-out she's enjoying herself more than you had expected.
Do you want to introduce your woman to a better lover? Any deficiencies or inadequacies in your performance in the bedroom might become more noticeable; when she has someone to compare them to. Your skills vs his! She could be thinking of the other guy, while with you! Talk about self-inflicted performance-anxiety!
If you have a significant disagreement, or a serious argument; breaking-up with you won't seem as difficult to do as before. She'll start weighing her pros and cons; now that she realizes she can attract other men, and might keep someone in-mind.
Guys too much into porn often want to watch a live porn-show, starring their mate. Watching somebody else doing someone you're supposed to love isn't true-love. You're objectifying the woman who has committed herself to you. Her respect for you will start to diminish, and any trust you've built will become compromised. You'll always wonder what she's thinking?
It's always better being a fantasy-vision in your mind; than an undertaking in the realm of reality. You wouldn't just be exploiting her body for your own entertainment; you'd be opening a Pandora's Box. She might start free-lancing, or saving numbers for those times when you've worn-out your welcome, or she's just bored with you. You'd always have to be on your best behavior, or else!
Run these thoughts through your mind a few times. Maybe those fantasies will just stay fantasies.
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A
male
reader, kenny  +, writes (19 November 2021):
 I agree with Honeypie, keep this fantasy inside your head, within the confines of your own mind.
Its just a fantasy, just keep it to yourself and don't ever act on it because if you did it could very well spell the end of your relationship.
Keep it to yourself, and just let it fizzle out of its own accord.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2021): I think it's fantasy to watch any couple have sex. And if you ever accidentally walked in on a couple in the act, or on a double date-- it stays branded in your mind. Maybe you made some amateur porn with with your GF. Now when fantasizing about sex, what better model do you have than the lady you have regular sex with. Say you have friends Bill and Linda, you sometimes fantasize about them going at it, but it's not real clear -- you never watched them. Then you think exactly how your Sally would go cowgirl on Bill. Anyway, that's how I explain it.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (19 November 2021):
 I'm guessing that the fantasy of it being a "porno" on your head is what makes it hot for you. Fantasy is very different from reality.
While cuckolding is a thing, I don't think most men who like the fantasy of it, would actually enjoy it in reality. To see your partner enjoy someone else. Maybe even more than themselves.
And most women... are not fans of being fodder for some sexual fetish of being "shared".
Keep the fantasy to inside your head. No harm there.
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