A
female
age
30-35,
*ridge89
writes:Why do relationships have to be so confusing??? Or is it just me looking into things too much?I have been in a relationship with my partner for just under a year. Things have been going pretty well untill just lately. To be honest we have sex maybe once or twice a fortnight. Im 22 and he is 30, I dont think age has to much to do with it. Just lately he has been really distant, it feels like I go out of my way to make him happy, we get up in the morning and go off to work not seing each other for most of the day, then come home, I make dinner and get qorte up on the house work etc, we sit down have dinner watch a little telly. Conversatioon over this time can sometimes be good or other time be very minimal. Then bed, he gets in rolls over and pretty much ignores me, no talk no nothing.Ive tried asking why he doesnt want to have sex with me and his answer is he doesnt know or he just doesnt feel like it. This is really confusing for me. I really want to know what he is thinking and try fix the problem but it most oftenly ends up in an argument. Am I waisting my time? I really dont think he would be cheating on me either but who knows. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, RedAthena  +, writes (18 June 2011):
 It seems like your REAL question is
"Why are we not having more sex?"
Well, let's see. You have been in a relationship for about a year, so the "honeymoon phase" is over, UNLESS you BOTH decide to make meaningful time for each other.
You have work, housework, telly, bills, responsibilities and other boring adult stuff. When is the last time you went out on a date?
You know, REAL date! An outing where you get dressed up a bit, and go OUT into the world with no other focus other than-I am going to enjoy my companion!
Do you know most relationship experts say couples should be setting aside at least one day a week just to reconnect as a couple? None of that time has to be exspensive, but PLEASE turn off the Telly!
Either your companion is tired, bored,physically can not, is depressed or has a low sex drive.
Do you miss your sex life with him? You already spoken to him about it and a loving and unselfish partner is going to WANT to make sure YOU are happy too.
Let him know you want BOTH of you to be happy and you do not know how to fix it......and you can not fix it on your own once you know whats wrong.
If he can not open up to you-then communication breaks down and the relationship loses its bond. It takes two people to hold it together.
Best Wishes.
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