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female
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*rincessnikki
writes: Why Do I Want A BabyI am 17 and have been with my 19 yr old bf for over 2an half yrs now. I am very happy with him, he treats me like a princess (hence the screen name), bu over the past few months all i can think about it having a baby.Now i work in a baby shop and so deal with screaming brats all the time, not to mention the cost of having children, bu i still dont feel any different. Its not jus a baby i want, its the wholoe new person. Im not into all this dressing babies up like dolls and stuff. Everyone in work says i am so good with kids. Always know how to talk to them and now how to improve development, even down to getting thrm to do things they refuse to do for their parents.I have spoken to my bf about how i feel bu he definatley doesnt feel the same. i can undersdtand why, i mean we are so young.It started in october last year. I left the school all me friends attended and went to college on my own. At first I thought it was i wanted to be loved and wanted the baby as a replacement, but i rejoined my school in february and the feelings are still there. I have even booked a girly holiday which i am looking forward to and i know i wont be able to go if i am pregnant. but still no change.I know having a baby would not be the best thing for a new baby at this time in my life. Thats what i try to tell myself every month when i find out i am not pregnant. Please help me, i dont want to feel like this any more. But why do I. HELP
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female
reader, willywombat  +, writes (29 March 2006):
 You have a fantasy of how this will be in your head. I think at 17 and with a bf who ahs stated he doesnt want kids yet you may be jumping the gun a little. It isnt all hearts and flowers having kids it can be pretty hard work. I am not saying you are not up to a bit of hard work. just take a look at what you would be getting into! Chances are if you get pregnant you will not have a long term relationship to fall back on when the going gets tough. If your bf has stated he is not ready your shouldn't fall pregnant acidentally in order to make him see things from your point of view! He will run. And because he has told you, you have no excuse not to listen to him really do you.
Honestly these urges will pass. Build up your life, get a house and a comitted relationship under your belt and try to ignore them/ enjoy your single life. It will all happen in good time.
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reader, tux  +, writes (29 March 2006):
 Those are natural urges. Heck I'm a guy and I have them.. but perhaps the best thing for you is to step back and relax a bit. Don't be too hasty in doing this. Give yourself sometime to have some fun until you are truly ready. Your bf needs to be ready and want to have a kid as well. It's not far to him to have one if he isn't ready. btw does he want kids but not right now? or doesnt want them in general? But when you feel you're ready, good luck.
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