A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: why do i seem to not care about the people i went to college with anymore? They're my closest and bestest friends! Yet i have purposely been distancing myself and making all sorts of excuses as to why i can't go out with them. I just feel like i want to get away and move on...It doesn't make sense because i used to love hanging out with them, most of my best times are with these guys. When we broke up for summer i missed them and felt sort of sad that college was over. And come this september, we're all going off to university so we wont see each other for a long time and might end up distancing... So why am i making that happen already?! There's nothing wrong with them, they haven't changed. But i feel like i want a change and it doesn't seem to bother me that we're all going separate ways this september. In fact, this saturday is our leavers get together and i'm the only one who isn't going. Not because i can't, but because i don't feel like it. What has happened here!? It's only been just over a month since college finished. Why would i have a sudden change of attitude and feelings towards them...
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broke up, move on, university Reply to this Question Share |
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 August 2011): I wouldn't worry about this too much, I agree with the other poster, but if you are not feeling depressed, but rather are excited about going away to make new friends, have new experiences and just feel like you are ready to move on to university, and the next, more mature, stage of your life, that's actually a really good thing! this is normal, and out of my university friends, hardly any of us keep in contact with our college/highschool mates from years ago.You make heaps of new friends at university, and even though I still have fond memories of my school friends, and occasionaly might see or hear from them, there isn't that need to be in constant contact like we would have back in school.
A
female
reader, RedAthena +, writes (25 August 2011):
How is every thing else going in your life?
Do you still have a passion and interest in hobbies and activities? Do you still go out and enjoy yourself, meet new people, socialize with others?
If yes, then you are the one that changed. That is not a bad thing! It just means that you have outgrown the friendships. I would suggest you keep in casual touch with your old friends, but you are not obligated to spend time with them.
If they keep asking you out and you keep ignoring them or telling them you have other plans..that is dishonest. You can tell them "Thank you, but no thank you" like you would politely turn down any invitation.
If you are not finding interest in ANYTHING you used, then you might be facing some depression. It sounds like your attitude change seems suprising to you. Have there been any huge changes in your life other than your withdrawl from your friends?
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