A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I am currently in an on/off relationship with a girl who is a single mum. While I care for this woman and enjoy her company I'm scared of commiting as I can't see things working out long term. Her little boy is a really good kid and I don't see any conflict arising directly with him. However, there are two potential roles I step in to, should the relationship go further. The first is the 'partner only' role where I am involved with her and her son as little as possible. Or the second where I rise to the role of step-dad. I do not favour the former as no man should try and come between a mother and child. But the second option has me scared sick, I'd not measure up, I'd be an awful (step)parent. So can't ignore the child and can't see myself as an integrated family member either. Any suggestions? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Moo's Mum  +, writes (29 April 2010):
 You don't have to be the child's father. He already has one of those. If you like his company you just need to enjoy hanging out with him and answer his many questions and queries as best you can. Just be a mate to him that's all a stepdad ever has to be. Don't worry about the future so much. If you like them both then be committed in the here and now and see where it goes.
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