A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: My boyfriend and I started having sex last month. With school we can't really manage to get together more than once a week, but when we do it's pretty uncomfortable. It has hurt each time, and I'm pretty dry. We glob on lube (silicone, if it makes a difference, since the KY clumped and dried quickly) and go slow. But even last time, when I was really turned on (and quite wet, for once) we had to stop after a few minutes. It's like a stinging sensation and thrusting gets incredibly uncomfortable.I know everyone says foreplay is key, but I feel like we don't really rush past it. Why am I still dry? is it supposed to still feel uncomfortable even after lubing up? I don't take meds. Is it because I don't drink enough water?Pretty much, I want to know if anyone else has experienced this with their first partner. Is my body still adjusting and it'll get better? How long did it take you all before you started enjoying sex?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2010): Get some books on sex and learn how to get your body to work.You will find that it is much better if you get knowledge and use that with practice, patience, and caution.By the way, if you aren't relaxed and trusting in a relationship, it can be really hard to get it all to work. A lot of people use alcohol or drugs to try to get past that but they miss out on the real good sex, the kind that really rocks your world, if they drink to much.
A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (26 October 2010):
Drinking water actually can have an effect. You know how when you're dehydrated your mouth can feel dry? Same deal with your vagina. So try drinking a bit more water. Also, does it sting when you don't use lube? Many women have nasty reactions to it. I know lube makes me sting like crazy down there for no apparent reason. If you're chafed even a little, the lube can/will make it hurt like none other. You say wet for once, which I take to mean you normally aren't wet. Since you just started having sex, you could be chafing/chafed and not realize that's what's wrong. I'm guessing that's what it is, since you say you're not normally wet, lube hurts, and it doesn't start to sting until a bit in. Chafing can really only be fixed with a bit of rest/time. And stopping sex as soon as it starts to hurt. If you're both virgins (STD free) and up for trying the pill, condoms can making chafing/drying much worse.
If you're truly turned on enough and none of those solutions are it, you may want to go talk to a doctor.
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