A
male
age
30-35,
*osie
writes:Please tell me what REALLY TURNS ON A WOMEN. What gives her that spark to feel so attracted she'll jump into your arms?
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female
reader, nomdeplume  +, writes (6 May 2011):
This is too easy, CONFIDENCE. Doesn't matter what you look like in comparisson to another as long as you are happy in your skin with everyone, know yourself, whether you are funny, serious, charming, a listener, romantic, raver, geek. Just know it and play it to the max if you enjoy YOU, so will anyone whom is around you.
PS. Good hygine, and dress well for your own style :) enjoy life x
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 May 2011): Large feet.
Yeah, that's what all women want in a man. It gives them the greatest sexual pleasure and...
Wait, was it feet, God, I'm confused now, I'm nearly 50 years old and I've forgotten what turns them on and I've got to start over!
Really, it is different for all women. What they really like, if they are psychologically healthy, is someone who is friendly, loving, nonthreatening, and who contributes to a positive self image of their self, and who is good to them. You don't have to be the most handsome, smart, or wealthy guy.
Wealth, cars, all sorts of shit, does attract some women, but you have to figure out which kind of woman you want to attract. Simply put, different stuff attracts different types of women.
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A
female
reader, Gherkinsaregrim  +, writes (4 May 2011):
Confidence. Most easily shown through good posture and a strong body.
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A
female
reader, natasia +, writes (4 May 2011):
 Within max 13 seconds, and usually within 5-7, we know if we want to get up close to someone. We know who they are. We know if we like them. Give us another couple of minutes, and we can judge pretty accurately all their pros and cons.Instinct. You can't learn it, or fake it. Having said that, certain other factors will override, or boost, a woman's wavering instinct - ie, if she doesn't immediately go for you, she might give you the benefit of the doubt if you are nice enough (and, in the case of some women, rich enough). So, be nice. And if you are rich, lucky.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (3 May 2011):
 Good communication, wonderful eyes that look into my very soul, a warming smile, a calm voice. A man who is honest, sincere, deep, caring. That is what attracts a woman. A man who makes her feel like she is the most special person in the entire universe, and that she will never have to question his loyalty to her, as she is his queen. When such a man looks at his woman with eyes that tell her that he wants her, adores her, is attracted to her, and needs her, she will be more than willing to sleep in his arms and make love to him, love filled with passion and lust.
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A
female
reader, hannah76 +, writes (3 May 2011):
 Lots of MONEY!!!! ha! No, honesty, cleanliness, being natural,interested in her and sharing and talking about her day!..............then lots of money!(only joking with the money)
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (3 May 2011):
 A very large penis. Well heck fire guys...it's 2:26 p.m. my time and we haven't had our daily penis question yet. This ought to bring 'em outta woods.
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A
male
reader, Odds +, writes (3 May 2011):
 Well, there's no one "secret" to it. But it's easier than a lot of people think.
Just remember these two principles and you should be able to figure things out. 1) Observe actions, not words. What a girl says she wants is meaningless, it's who she chooses to date that you should pay attention to. 2) You can change your actions and personality, but not others'. You can adjust your behavior and mindset to be more attractive, but you can't *make* any girl fall for you.
Given that information, here's a few things I've observed and changes I've made. You'll notice that a lot of them could be treated as either "how to get chicks" or "how to be a better person." The latter is basically the former plus "have good morals."
- Confidence. By this, I mean you act and speak without hesitating, and you don't care what other people think or say about it. You have faith in your ability to handle anything.
- Extroversion. Be social. Talk to everyone, pretty, ugly, young, old, men, women. If you only talk to guys, you'll never meet women. If you only talk to pretty girls, their friends will sabotage your efforts. You don't have to get along with everyone, you just have to treat them all as if they deserve some of your attention.
- Self-mastery. Don't get upset when you fail, or when a particular woman doesn't like you. Don't get emotional except on your own terms. Don't let anyone control you, either with direct orders or sly manipulation. If someone tries to control you or mess with you, laugh it off like it's no big deal. If she's being demanding or bitchy, laugh and tease her a little bit, instead of just doing what she wants so she'll stop complaining.
- Stay in shape. I don't know about South Africa, but there's a lot of out-of-shape folks here in America. You don't have to be a gorilla, just be strong eonugh to look good and move furniture.
- Enjoy life. Laugh at things. Make jokes. Don't take anyone too seriously, especially women. Find a hobby that fulfills you, especially manly physical ones like rock climbing, carpentry, or martial arts.
- Be willing to get angry. This may sound like a contradiction of the previous point, but it's all a matter of degree. If someone is not worth getting angry at, you laugh off any attempt to mess with you. If someone (even your girlfriend) is being truly disrespectful, really crossing a line, you have to be willing and able to look them in the eye, in a calm and controlled manner, showing that you're mad but still in control and tell them to either stop or leave. Don't yell or hit things, unless they throw the first punch, but keeping your anger all bottled up isn't a virtue, it's cowardice. Besides, women want a man who can protect them, and a man who is incapable of getting angry certainly can't protect anyone.
- Always be willing to walk away. This is probably the hardest one to get. A woman's ideal man is one who *could* get other women, but *chooses* not to. She wants a man who will not put up with too much nonsense. Some of it, yes, but not too much. Don't be a doormat, have some self-respect. Every couple has fights over stupid things, but she has to know there are lines she can't cross without losing you. She will love you more for it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 May 2011): Girls don't do that. You have to pursue them.
Oosie no girl drops to the feet of a guy unless she's very promiscuous or the guy is very wealthy and/or very handsome.
Now you most likely don't want a promiscuous girl and well if you were wealthy or extremely handsome then you wouldn't be asking this question.
"What gives her that spark to feel so attracted she'll jump into your arms?" A guy who she is attracted to, who has spent time, money and energy getting to know her and romancing her. A guy who has made the effort and pursued her, a guy who has proven he deserves that and a guy who has swept her off her feet. Basically a confident, funny, attentive guy who gives a lot of himself, is fun to be with and makes her feel special. Just so you know, she doesn't necessarily have to be attracted to you at the beginning, a great guy who has all she is looking for in a guy, will become very attractive to that girl.
Oosie you will never get a girl if all you do is sit back and wait, looking to find the holy grail that makes women feel a spark with you, without doing anything. Guys that have that, have it naturally, they were just born with looks and charisma, for most of us though we have to work at it and we have to work hard to develop that kind of a spark in a woman. But trust me, if you put in the effort then you can get to the point where just thinking about you makes a woman weak at the knees.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (3 May 2011):
 HONESTYSINCERITYINTEGRITY
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