A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:he is my brother in law and i know i shouldnt feel this way but i find myself being attracted to him. i dont know why. theres just something about him i cant seem to let go. this started when we were both young and as we are growing up, these feelings are becoming stronger. i always dream about him, and think about him. i just cant help it any longer ... ,i like him and i know he likes me too but doesnt know what to do. what should i do???? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 December 2008): I am a BiL...That said, I have feelings for my SiL. Would it ever work? I don't think either of us know each other well enough as lovers or as people who would live together to know.But, I wonder...and want to know. If the marriages is ending, perhaps the "other" is a better fit? I have to admit that perhaps her/his family might think you are a better fit too? Not that my situation applies to everyone else, but I know my SiL's family thinks my marriage should end, thinks my spouse is making mistakes, and thinks I am the one being "put out."Sad, but don't judge unless you kno the specific situation. Happiness is hard to come by, and I think you and the BiL can make adult decisions knowing what is likely to happen ...I wish you well with the hard decisions...
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 December 2008): Hi, me again, the one loving his BIL too...
I just wanted to add that I also stopped feeling guilty when I realized that my BIL and I are not blood related and that we are just a man and a woman that love and are attracted to each other but in an impossible situation since one of us is married to someone that we both love. Sounds confusing but I know you will understand me.
Hope this helps too!
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 December 2008): Hi there!I am in your same situation and have been for 2 years and a half so I totally understand where you come from.Please don't pay too much attention to some negative answers you will get a lot of those but they have not clue what you are going through so they can't understand you.I wish I could help you but being in the same boat as you I can only say that after posting a similar question some time ago I found out there are lots of people going through the same, having this impossible or forbidden love for somebody who has same feelings but that cannot be with them, and just reading their posts helped me a lot. I did not feel alone and realized this is very common. That made me stop feeling guilty about it and it made my life a lot easier! Somebody told me once that I was very lucky because my BIL will always be in my life and I can enjoy having these feelings or desire for him and just flirt and talk and have good times without ever crossing the line, you know, and just enjoy the attraction and connection that we will always feel for each other. I know it's very hard because when you are in love with somebody you just want to be with them and to fight these feelings and the attraction is not easy at all, tell me about it! :-) Some people I read they tell each other how they feel and most then start affairs. My BIL and I don't have to tell each other how we feel because we know just looking into each other's eyes. It's amazing! So, I don't know if I will ever tell him with words how I feel but for now I am just ejoying our innocent flirting and especially our friendship that I value a lot. Hope this helps girl. Be strong and good luck!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 December 2008): NO, NO, NO, you need to forget your brother in law. he is not worth it. i used to fancy my brother in law. he was about 20 and i was about 23 at the time, but thought of all the possible damages it would have caused. i didnt mean to upset him, he most probably holds a grudge against me for that and feels uncomfortable around me because of that. bit humiliating if i must say to the rest of the family but the important thing is that ive grown over that. i see him as a brother now and i wish to rebuild that sister-brother relationship that we lost. i want him to trust me as a sister. i hope this is a valuable lesson to you. DONT DO IT !!! YOU WILL LOOK BACK AND SAY OMW, I CANT BELIEVE I TRIED TO DO THAT! But goodluck!!!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 December 2008): Hi girl! you know, the forbidden is very exciting , but destroying your whole family is not. So it is up to you to stop imagining and fantasizing about it, avoid him as much as you can, and its time to meet that someone special for you, he's out there waiting for you...be happy and choose the love for your family!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2008): Hi
You dont know what to do?
How about remembering when you were young WHO ELSE you probably grew up with? was it your SISTER?
Do the right thing and get your own man.
Or CHOOSE to hurt your family and yourself.
via con dios
...............................
A
female
reader, petina1  +, writes (12 December 2008):
 If you do anything about it I would expect a massive family fall out. Members of the family will certainly be divided and there could be a lot of heartache and trouble. Is there any children involved? They will be in the firing line. Brothers will fall out and that may never be repaired. Do what you both have to do but expect trouble. hope this helps.
...............................
|
