A
female
age
41-50,
*ortugueseItalian
writes:Ok, i don't know to say this but I never have my pleasure and he used to give me everything i want and then when he got me, he stops trying.Now he doesn't even want to do what i want to do.Like sex, making out, kissing (he kisses the cats instead),no more cuddling :(Whenever i want to go somewhere he gets mad and always wants to go where he wants to goSo what should i do? what do you think? I try everything but he doesnt give a s^^t about out relationship.
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male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (7 March 2012):
 I detected this detail in your submittal: "...Whenever i want to go somewhere .."This leads me to believe that you and he share the same address. Is that so????If "yes," then you have committed the cardinal error of young women everywhere.... you have MOVED IN WITH this guy believing that he was a nice guy....Here's my revelation: WHEN a girl moves in with a guy, she gives him ALL THE POWER in their "relationship" and he NO LONGER has to be nice to her.... because he knows that she will put out for him at HIS will.... AND, she is POWERLESS to do anything to prevent him from going out to have s*x with OTHER girls... That is, until and unless she comes to her senses and extricates herself from the "live together" relationship....Good luck...
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (7 March 2012):
 So what should I do? Come on BE HAPPY. Sadly you won’t be happy with this man… if you are trying and he is not… you stop trying. You then get the strength to leave if you are that unhappy.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (7 March 2012):
 Why are you still with him if he doesn't give a shit about the relationship?
You don't sound happy, you don't even sound content. Is there a reason you think you HAVE to stay with this guy?
Talk to him, if nothing changes , make the change you NEED to be happy. If that means dump him, then go for it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2012): Ola,
Sorry to hear how your man is taking you for granted… How long have you been together? This will give an indication why the change. If he used to give you everything, we know it’s possible, so it’s a matter of making him want to impress you again.
Men love the chase, conquering, pursuing us. Some once they catch us, treasure the gift they have been granted, others relax and take us for granted. This goes both ways, women do it too to their men.
So the cat is getting more action than you? ;-) That is no good! You need to remind him how much better than the cat you are ;-) more fun, more responsive, more intelligent, more sexy!
Begging and pleading won’t work, putting pressure on him won’t work – you need to inspire him, and re-awaken what made him notice you to begin with.
Are you happy (apart from how he treats you)? Are you excited about life in general? Are you fulfilling your life’s purpose and meaning? If you are a career girl, are you taking on challenges and making a difference? If you’re a stay at home girl or mother, do you make the home sunshine? A soft place to fall? Do you have your own interests? Or do you wait for him to make you happy? One person cannot be all things to us.
You must chase life with gusto, have balance in all spheres, and your man is there to share it with you, to make it extra special.
If any of the above things need changing in yourself, do it. Look to yourself for the change first, and see if anything changes with him. If not, have a good conversation with him when you have uninterrupted time, and share how you feel. Don’t blame him, don’t acuse him, rather share only how YOU feel, as your feelings are valid, and he won’t get defensive and can share his side too.
Wishing you happiness,
xxxx E
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