A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi.im pretty much with a guy... by pretty much i mean that we know we like eachother bt he's at uni atm and we're gonna see how it goes when he gets back home.my problem is that i get so jealous! i cant help but get so insecure. when ive been with guys in the past i've been cheated on and have had them texting and flirting with other girls right infront of me. every single relationship ive had has been broken up by the guy doing this.I really really really really like this guy and i kno he feels the same but i'm terrifed of f*kin things up with him because i constantly think he's up to something and since I know already that he's naturally a flirt, it will make it more difficult for me.whenever i see him talkin to a girl, i feel anger and sadness and i constantly have this feeling that he will just leave me or will cheat on me when we're together even though i know that he wouldn't...my trust has been broken soo many times and i just cna't get this feeling that he will cheat or stop liking me very quickly... it could be just not texting me back once and i will think that he's with another girl or has stopped liking me. What can i do to stop these insecurities from ruining what i have?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 November 2008): I empathise. Been in pretty much the same situation of being hurt before and then not trusting the good guy, especially if a guy doesn't text back I think he's lost all interest.
I'll give you some advice my friends gave me when my guy didn't text back and I was getting down about it. Give the guy a break, and yourself. There could be a million reasons why he didn't text back, none of which mean he's no longer interested. Just think about all the reasons why you may not have texted someone back and how innocent they are.
It is so hard to trust people and noone wants to look like an idiot if it turns out they trusted the wrong person, but is that enough of a reason for you to risk ruining your relationship with this guy? love is full of risks and for us that risk may be actually trusting someone and accepting that they do like you even if they don't prove it all the time or aways reply to texts.
But do be wary of going the other way and being naive or a door mat..
Good luck and chill out.
A
male
reader, Roran Cullen  +, writes (31 October 2008):
 First of all i am sorry to hear that your boyfriend is doing this
I think he is cheating on you if he texting and flirting with other girls. If this is bothering you maybe you should tell him about it
I do not know what he is thinking. But again tell him about it ask him to stop. if not break up you don't need anyone playing with your emotion, and wait for a guy who is faithful and can love you as you are
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