A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Five years ago I made a list of qualities I wanted in a man. To my surprise, he actually existed-right down to the blue-green eyes and hometown. This freaked me out a bit but hey, coincidences happen right? Anyway, I enjoy him a lot. We've been comfortable with each other from day one. But I'm worried that we're moving fast, we don't plan dates as much as we know for sure that we'll be seeing each other. We talk about trips. Yesterday, he made a joke about us being 80 years old and playfully admonishing him for this quirky habit he has I secretly find cute. We saw previews at a movie and it's settled which ones we'll see. He's a great guy: intelligent, kind, funny and we can't go two minutes without laughing. I teased him once about a girl and he said " well she can try all she wants but I think I've found someone." Chemistry is also intense. We look each other in the eye and can't look away. It's barely been a month...It surprised me that yesterday, I got a little emotional at the thought of hurting him. He told me a little about his history and he's been very hurt. He just came back from a trip and told me that he had really missed me. I care about him already, I really like him but I'm very nervous. Are we moving too fast? Am I setting myself up to think he's someone very special? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (28 July 2015):
 HE IS someone special, but whether he is "The One" from your list or not, is impossible to say.
I would just continue to go slow, if he is a keeper he will be fine with a slow pace. I'd also suggest you leave lists for going grocery shopping, not for finding a mate. And don't forget.. you made that 5 YEARS ago, a lot can happen in 5 years. So don't GET hung up on "the list"...
Trust me his eye color is IRRELEVANT compared to his personality, values, humor and how he treats you.
Spend time with him in person, and don't hump into bed with him because you "think" he checks all your boxes - a month in you two still don't REALLY know each other that well.
Other then that, ENJOY
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