A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hi, i would appreciate anyone's guidance here, it’s very much needed! ive been broken up with my ex for about a year now, shes 19 and im 20. weve remained really close friends ( after we had some space ) ever since and my problem is that i still care deeply for her, not just as a friend, im still in love with her. she broke up with me because she realised that she needed to experience her life ( ie. college, parties, travelling, etc ) and i fully understand that, but it kills me to think of her meeting someone else, to the point of tears because im trying to let her go but i love her so much! as long as shes happy id never ruin our friendship by telling her how i feel. sometimes i feel like shes giving me signs and i try not to take any notice but i think part of her feels the way i do now‚ ie. i love her but right now wer just not meant to be together. can anyone give me advice on how to deal with this? because i do want to stay best friends but its very difficult sometimes
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 August 2009): there is a way forward here but you must be brave because you might not like the outcome . explain to her how you feel if she is a true friend she will understand your delima and give you a straight answer . but if you are not honest to her about your true feelings then your friendship will suffer and you may lose her all together "be brave" and speak to her about this pls
A
male
reader, loveburns  +, writes (27 August 2009):
For what its worth, I reckon you shouldn't try to be 'friends' any more. Obviously you guys are able to talk still, which is great. It sucks if someone you loved is just completely gone, and you have to just write time spent together as soemthing bad.It may be the case that she still depends on you a bit. If this is so, and you want her back, just saying you're too busy to talk, and have other things to do right now may 'flush her out' and make her realise that she needs you.On the other hand, maybe she truly is over you. Sometimes this happens and it hurts. In this case, not talking to her is still prob the best option. If you are going to move on it is something you need to do yourself, not holding an ex's hand.So I reckon just give yourself space from her and see where it leads because the status quo is only going to hurt you more in the long run.
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