A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hello. i really need some advice. Im off out with afew mates this weekend one of which is the guy ive loved for ages. My mates say he likes me to but hes to shy, things have happened in the past that may suggest this such as playfighting which lead to cuddling one night when we were left alone, the fact he goes straight to them to talk to them but not me and other things. People are pretty sure he does. last time we all met up afterwards they left and me and him walked home but sat talking for ages and he brought up the fact that i was flirting with this other guy(which i wasnt really). previously in the night he said to one of my mates "common if they;re gonna do that(mess around) we will. And shes certain hes just jealous. I have now told him i dont fancy this other guy. he also took me home one night when i was ill and he was holding my hand, fair enough that night i was all just hugging him constantly.Thing is hes shy and so am i, to the point where we dont actually talk properly to each other or anything. When the playfighting and cuddling happened he started it. So im not sure how to get it started again. problem is he goes to the others because they;re easiest and i cant seem to get him back once we;ve been like that for so long. Partly because i dont have the confidence to flirt with him. its just not who i am. Can any of you just give me some tips on to how to make this night go well and to help me speak to him more or even just mess around. neither of us are the flirty type at all. We;re just so shy i darent do things incase they go wrong. Any advice?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2010): So you're already friends and comfortable with each other? That's amazing because it opens the door for 'the small touch' method. A tap on the arm plaayfully, brush up against him accidentally. All these things, along with the play fighting, are a simple way of flirting. It's initiating touch which in turn is letting you into his personal space.
Eye contact, hold it for longer. Get that glint into your eye, you know that one that says 'kiss me' without you having to say anything at all.
Smile, smiling is universally accepted as friendly, inviting, open and kind. It may encourage him to make a move. Don't smile like the joker though, you don't want him to think you're cuckoo.
Watch the way he stands. If he angles his body towards you even when he's talking to somebody else, he likes you a lot. Watch his feet, do they point at you? Your feet will point to the person you find the most attractive subconsciously. Don't worry if the don't though. Body language is a hard science that can be influenced by other factors like shyness.
Talk find a hobby in common. Something you could do togther, alone. Does he like films? Isn't there that new one coming out...work on your friendship. It'll help you to bridge that gap over your shyness.
Good luck
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