A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Regarding including others, isn't it possible that people who are used to having their own group that has gotten together for years, are so comfortable with their group that they do not want to have to invite new people and make them feel welcome? This is kind of a chore. We don't do a lot of entertaining. We have four children ages 10, 8 1/2, 7 and 3 1/2. I love to entertain, and I love to be included and invited. But when I turn the tables and think about inviting the couple who I was referring to, who do not invite me or us (my husband and I), I feel a little funny about it as they would not know my or my husband's family. They would not know any of our friends unless I invited local people. So maybe it is too much to expect for others to include other friends who do not know the group. We used to have a group that we got together with, but the couple who got it together got a divorce, and we haven't gotten together much since. So when I think of having a party and inviting other people, I think, "Who would I invite?" It really is hard if they are not a group. Sometimes neighbors expect to be invited. If you invite so and so, you have to invite so and so. You know how it goes. Some couples who I would like to invite, I feel may not be comfortable as they are used to their own group. When I seriously sit down and think about it, it is not that simple.But I would think that a birthday party would be different, that if you were friends with them, you should be invited. Does anybody have an opinion on this? Should I be offended for not being invited? What are your thoughts and ideas on inviting and including? Are most people's groups closed or open for others to join? Would the majority of the people that you know easily welcome you into their groups and activities, or would they not? How do you take this? How do most people feel? I'm really interested. I think this is an interesting topic for discussion.Looking forward to your reply
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female
reader, kellyxxx  +, writes (16 February 2009):
 if you dont click with someone and there is not a spark then dont waste time inviting them into you're life...if its that hard then dont bother.x
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