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male
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anonymous
writes: I don't know what to think so please help. I was texting this girl last night and it was going great. I have only seen her twice before but anyway we said we would be best friends (even though i have only really started talking to her) and i asked her if we wanted to meet up. Before i did text her this i thought it might scare and put her off but then i just thought i would go for it. She didn't text bak so then i text her saying that i couldn't meet up because i was meting a friend incase i did put her off. But i think it has only put her off more! what should i do please help! because i think i have messed up my chances with her badly because i want it to lead into a relationship.
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female
reader, DrPsych  +, writes (30 May 2006):
 Call me old fashioned...but that text message thing just doesn't work for dating. Text messages are a bit open to misinterpretation, and you get a better impression of what someone is thinking of you by actually talking to them. There could be lots of reasons why she hasn't got back to you like no credit on her phone, or just being busy. You have already had contact with this girl in the past, so take a deep breath and phone her up in a couple of days. She may knock you back, but she may say yes to a date. Either way you can quickly resolve the issue without jumping on your mobile everytime it beeps...just in case it is a text from her. Good luck!!!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 May 2006): I think you'll have to wait this out and see if she texts you.
At the beginning stages of dating, both of you have the right to walk away without having to answer to your decision. If she has chosen to ignore you this early on, you must respect her decision and not pursue her.
Try not to feel bad about this - it's not your fault, it's that she doesn't feel you are right for her and texting, or trying to make her change her mind won't work, she'll think you are stalking her. Look at it this way - if you started dating a girl, but you weren't interested, you have the right to ignore her. You wouldn't like it if continued trying to pursue you, would you?
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