A
female
age
26-29,
*hante'
writes:So im with this guy and we have are good times and bad times and we argue everyday but we never go to bed mad at each other. Well everytime me and him get into an arguement he says its all my fault i dont think, and when he gets REALLY mad at me he calls me stupid. I usually take the heat because im tired of argueing with him but when i really feel as if something was his mistake he will say, i didnt do anything wrong, its never my fault, NOTHINGS ever my fault. He can be controlling sometimes but its nothing severe, and so now when im mad at him about something, i keep it to myself and he says whats wrong with me, and begs me to tell him, and i dont want to cause were going to argue. And he said it makes him mad when i dont tell him, and we end up argueing about me keeping it to myself. Not only that but he pulls this line on me." i thought were suppose to tell each other everything?""you act like you dont trust me""How am i suppose to fix it if i dont know why you're mad?"But whenever hes doing something that i dont like or has a problem and wont tell me and i use those lines he says " its different cause im a guy and you're a girl'...Any advice? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2010): Well it sounds to me like ur in a very controling relashinship and I got 2 words for you GET OUT cause it can lead to much worse things plus it sounds like he dosent trust you and could be accusing you of cheeting but if u don't even think you've been acting like this then some signs that he might be cheeting is that he is accusing u and saying I can't belive you don't trust me so I would say either sort out ur problems or dump him cause men are deciving.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2010): when these arguements start and he starts blaming everything on you, the end is just around the bend. there is no foundation here for a relationship. relationships are based on respect, honor and trust. being able to say im sorry honey, i was wrong...its a must in a relationship. i read somewhere that love means never having to say "i'm sorry"...well that simply isnt true. love means sayin "i'm sorry" even when you know it wasnt your fault. BUT it doesnt mean to always take the blame for the things he does. its a balance, one that is sometimes hard to find, but i know that if he is using these lines to convince you everything is your fault, then you will not last as a couple. you will ~probably already do~ resent him. you will resent the fact that he doesnt respect your thoughts and opinions. there is hope that he could mature and "get it" but i really doubt it. for your sake i hope so...good luck sweetheart, mal
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