A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Right, so. Me and my girlfriend have been together for 2 years (today funnily enough). We have been very much in love and spend everyday together despite living with parents. A few months ago I saw texts from another guy who she works with. Very rude texts. This obviously really hurt but i didn't mention anything to her. We have a really big holiday coming up which has cost a fortune but something I really can't miss (I get to see my best friend after 2 years of not seeing him)This morning I saw some more texts from the guy to her, but this time asked what she is going to do to him next and how they've had a few kisses ect. Before we got together, they had a 'fling'. I have no doubt she loves me. But, she has very little self esteem and struggles to feel sexy sometimes. I try my hardest to tell her shes beautiful and make her feel good. What do I do? I don't really want to break up with her but I can't see myself getting over this. I'm heart broken. But I can't even talk to her about it before this holiday. the thought of seeing her really is making me feel sick. Can someone please give me some advice and let me know there opinions?Sorry for the lenght, really needed to vent :)
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best friend, on holiday, self esteem, text Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 March 2013): Let her go to her family wedding alone. You fly to your friend as planned it will do you good. She has broken your trust,treated you badly. Why pretend to be a happy couple?Any repairing or breaking up can be done after you have had a break from her. Ring the travel agent mate
A
female
reader, oldbag +, writes (14 March 2013):
 Hi
Wow,so sorry to hear this,the timing is rubbish too.
If it was me I would dump her sorry arse,tell her why very clearly and go have the holiday of your life - without her.
She doesn't deserve your love, I doubt she has self esteem issues and if she does, it's not a reason nor excuse to treat you so badly.You can't help her either, it's down to her,but I think she has plenty of confidence.
I am sure a damn good break,spent seeing your best mate, is just what the doctor would order for you
Good luck
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 March 2013): Yeah, its a two part holiday. The first part is with her family for a wedding then the second part is flying to another country to see my friend.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (14 March 2013):
 I don't see how you can possibly fake that you are okay with the relationship and go on holiday together. Granted, it's bad timing, but you may as well get this over with and have THE TALK with her now.
If her self esteem is so low that she needs to text dirty talk with an old fling, um, she needs some professional help. You trying to boost her isn't going to fix her issues.
Is there any reason why you can't go on the holiday without her?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 March 2013): Hi the bottom line is you are scared to loose her and therefore have not confronted her on the inappropriate SMS.Stop feeling sorry for yourself and there is no reason for you to doubt yourself. If you were not attractive or a wonderful guy, why would any girl be going out with you. Clearly they see u as goodlooking someone that i sfun to be around. So if you want to kill your current or future relations lacking confidence is definitely no strong attraction.Getting back to the sms. You need to confront her and ask her outright what does your realtionship mean to her or why would she be talking/sms this guy? If all innocent why did she not mention it?If you find out that she is chatting to this guy and clearly its just not friends then holiday or not, end things, you deserve a lot more love and respect and if she will not give you some one will. Also worst case you break up and you go on holiday on your own. WIll not also helpful but you just might meet someone special.
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