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Tried to get through, came back to bite me in the butt

Tagged as: Breaking up<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (30 December 2008) 1 Answers - (Newest, 30 December 2008)
A female United States age 51-59, *R Princess writes:

Well, I guess I was wrong. He ended up taking his wife back and it was the Saturday before X-mas eve and I found out on X-mas eve by driving by his house and seeing her car in the drive way, he says he didn't want to hurt me but not only did he hurt me he hurt my son too. My son got close to him and was hoping that he would be a father figure, he is 10yrs old. I can't believe he didn't have the guts to man up and tell me. He says he is so sorry but I can't believe a word he says. I'm so hurt, I can't sleep, I can't eat. I've been trying to stay busy, I started exercising, I just want to get him out of my head and my heart, he made me believe we had a future together. My heart feels like it has been broken into little pieces and I will never love anyone the way I loved him. I know time heals all wounds but I just want time to pass by quickly so I can heal and get over him. The worst thing about all of this is that we live close to eachother and my son plays baseball where he'll be coaching and we have mutual friends and visit the same local pub. I can't stop living my life because he all of the sudden decides he made the wrong choice, but he did the same thing to her as he did to me and I'm sure he'll do it again but it won't be with me. Well, I'm going to get dressed up and go to our local bar for New Years, we were supposed to go together and I might run into him, he says he not taking her but that just goes to show what kind of man he is. How do I get through this now? How do I get him out of my heart and my head?

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (30 December 2008):

Honeypie agony auntI'm sorry your son got hurt. Though (and I'm sure you have heard this before) getting involved with a married man is never a good idea. Someone always gets hurt. Sometimes it's the wife other times it's the mistress.

Married people who engage in an affair (this is my personal opinion) are not only selfish - they are self deluding. They believe they can re-capture something they have lost in their marriage. Yet they don't divorce before they go on a search for that "new-car smell". They want their cake and eat it too.

Learn from it and in the future maybe only date men who are actually available?

Enjoy New Years, but honestly why go to a place he might show up, unless you want to see him? You might end up having a miserable time at the party whether he shows up or not. I'd do something else for fun.

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